Narrator: Michael Bluth was working at home when his son made a curious request.
George Michael: Dad, would anyone miss this Peter and the Wolf read-along record?
Michael: No. Actually, I think that's part of the model home decorations. Why?
George Michael: You're right. My girlfriend Ann wants to have a Christian music bonfire here.
Michael: That sounds like some mild fun. I think we've got some Christmas music.
George Michael: Oh, no. It's not- It's not a "Christian music" bonfire. It's a Christian "music bonfire." You know, we burn all satanic music. The thing is, though, the only music I have is either instructional or humor.
Narrator: He'd been particularly fond of a CD of something called The Jerky Boys.
[flashback:]
Michael: [answers phone] Hello.
George Michael: Hey, nitz. Hey, jerky. I wanna buy a house, Dad. It's gotta be big.
Michael: You- You said "Dad," buddy.
George Michael: Shut up, jerky.

Maeby: George Michael? Are you protesting this?
George Michael: This isn't the line?
Ann: Yes, he is protesting this. He even helped me make the signs.
George Michael: Well, only mine and the one that says, "This is a tricky, gray area."

Michael: It sounds like a lot more than it actually is. You know, you've already spent $1,200 on eggs. And that would be it forever. Keep in mind, we are building something that is not only for our own kids; it's also for George Michael and Maeby's kids, too.
George Michael: What? What? We can't have kids! What are you? I mean, it's not even an option, really. [chuckles]
Michael: Well, eventually, you'll want to.
George Michael: Sure, I may want to, you know, now. I-It doesn't matter. Either way, I won't do anything about it. Come on!

Michael: Am I interrupting?
George Michael: Uh, sorry. It's- You know how deadlines are with this stuff. It's tight.
[George Michael's browser is open to a "Which Anne Hathaway character are you?" quiz]
Michael: Sure. You're selling the company? I thought the free office space would help.
George Michael: No, it's just, you know, we have so many expenses that I don't know how I'm gonna pay the staff. I mean, I've gone through this three times. I'm just... I gotta get smart.
Michael: Well, hey, can't you get an intern?
George Michael: No, I keep getting Catwoman.
Michael: What's that?
George Michael: It's the thread-count question. It's gotta be the thread-count question.

Michael: Dad was always banker, so there was no beating him.
Buster: Totally.
George Michael: He should've been stocking up on those "get out of jail free" cards.
Gob: Good one, George Michael!

George Michael: Someone's coming. What do we do?
Maeby: I don't know. I always get caught.
George Michael: Save yourself. I'll take the hit. My record's clean. Well, I got my bike seat stolen once but I don't think it counts on your record if you're the victim. I mean, there is a record of this, but it's not like I'm the...
Maeby: Yeah, I got it. Thanks. I'll take the rap next time we do something like this, okay?
George Michael: Next time.

Narrator: And George Michael was trying to pass as a more muscular boy than he actually was.
George Michael: One hundred.
Maeby: One hundred? I had you at 10.
George Michael: I did some earlier in the day. It's a running total. So what's with the suitcase?
Maeby: It's a little test to get my parents to notice me. You ever get the feeling like no one even sees you?
George Michael: I've got a really good body, so no.

George Michael: Was that Gangie who was just- [slips]
Michael: You all right? Sorry. Your grandmother had a little accident here.
George Michael: Oh. Does that mean she's gonna have to come live with us?
Michael: No, no. No. It was- It was her drink, and even if it wasn't, just...

Maeby: Hey, remember that French movie we tried to sneak into once, Dangerous Cousins?
George Michael: No, l-Why? Did we- I don't remember that, no.
Narrator: George Michael remembered very well. In fact, he currently had a copy of the DVD hidden in his sock drawer.
George Michael: Kind of. [closes sock drawer] Why do you ask?

Narrator: Previously on Arrested Development, Michael and his son were camping out at the family cabin before it was to be relocated.
George Michael: I'm just in the middle of a stupid girl problem, that's all.
Michael: I don't even have a girl much less a stupid one.
George Michael: No, the problem is stupid, the girl isn't stupid.
Narrator: But if they ever had a child, it would be. Because the girl was his cousin Maeby.