Beverly: Boys, stop. I see what's happening here. Coach Rick has a hurt neck, but Coach Nick's heart is in a lot more pain.
Coach Nick: Whatever. Doesn't matter.
Beverly: No, in this house, our feelings matter.
Murray: I feel they both should go.
Beverly: Shh. Talk to your little brother, Coach Nick. Use your words.
Coach Nick: When you didn't ask for my help, it made me sad. 'Cause, you know, my love for you is big as my pecs.
Coach Mellor: That's, like, the biggest love a man can have.

Murray: You do realize that you're replacing our children with grown men?
Beverly: Stop. They're simply sleeping in their rooms, wearing their clothes, and playing with their toys. Now, if ya don't mind, I need to get some prunes into our son's gym coach.

Coach Mellor: Mama G! Good news, my tummy's feeling way better. I made real good.
Beverly: [chuckling] That is fantastic! Oh, my God, what have I done?
Coach Nick: Can you guys pipe down a bit? I'm working on my music.
Beverly: What have I done?

Andy: Uh, Bar? We just drove three hours. You said there was a sick college rager going on.
Barry: Did I say "rager"? Pretty sure I said "angry standoff in a dorm room."
Naked Rob: Dude, I missed my nana's birthday for this.
Matt: Yeah, man. This is the worst thing you and Geoff have ever done.
Geoff: What?!
Barry: I told him it was your idea. You get it. [to Lainey] Also seems like a good time to say I still have feelings for you.
Lainey: It may be the worst time.
Barry: Okay, Lainey's not on board.

Beverly: So much for the Bevolution. It's the first weekend ever without our kids, and I completely lost my mind.
Murray: Well, we still have a few more years to ease into it.
Beverly: And what am I gonna do when they all leave for good?
Murray: Honestly, it's gonna be awful for the both of us.
Beverly: Please. For the last four years all you've talked about is how you want them all to leave so you can have some peace and quiet.
Murray: Bevie, you know I hate change but it's easier for me to say, "I want them out" than to admit I love our crazy, loud family.
Beverly: You're gonna miss 'em, huh? Really helps to know I'm not alone.

Erica: Look, college has been way harder than I thought, but you've been the only thing that's made it easier.
Other Erica: I'm sorry I ate your Shark Bites.
Erica: I'm sorry I stole your ice tray.
Other Erica: I'm sorry I played the trumpet in your face.
Erica: I'm sorry that I lured half my high school up here.
Other Erica: I'm sorry I made up Hector.
Erica: What?!
Other Erica: He's so not real. I just, like, needed you to go away.
Erica: That is brilliant and totally something I would do!

Lainey: I got to admit, that six-hour bus ride was almost worth it.
Erica: I'm so sorry, Lainey.
Lainey: It's okay. It was so good to see you. And Barry, too, kinda.
Barry: I heard that! She said it was kinda okay to see me. This is kinda the greatest night of my life!

Coach Mellor: Well, aren't you a tall glass of Gatorade? Go get 'em, Ricky!

Coach Mellor: After a great deal of legal wrangling, I am excited introduce a new unit: full-contact Red Rover.
All: Oh!
Beverly: Ugh! Did I hear somebody say "full-contact"?
Adult Adam: [v.o.] But like clockwork, my smother would always save me from the dangers of physical movement.
Beverly: I forced Principal Ball to give me an advanced copy of all your units, and my baby is not doing anything full contact.
Adam: It's all very embarrassing, but so worth it.

Coach Mellor: Goldfarb, kick us off.
Adam: Sorry, Coach. My old lady likes to keep all this on safe ground. She'll be here in three, two, one Mama!
Coach Mellor: Face it, Goldfarb, she's a no-show. Time to let the rope get to know every part of you.
Adam: Thing is, my mom's doing this whole Bevolution to reinvent herself and kind of dropped the ball on her schmoopie.
Coach Mellor: [whistle blows] Move!