‘Shadowing Glenn’
Season 4, Episode 9 - Aired December 13, 2018
Glenn takes Amy under his wing when she expresses an interest in becoming a manager. Meanwhile, Dina starts to question her career choices, and Cheyenne and Mateo decide to start a business together.
Quote from Dina
Justine: Maybe you could be a bike messenger.
Dina: Uh, like Joseph Gordon-Levitt in Premium Rush? I think I'll pass on being chased around by a corrupt cop because I'm unknowingly delivering $50,000 to a Chinese human trafficker, thanks.
Garrett: What are you trying to do, get her killed?
Dina: What about scuba cop? Is that a job?
Jonah: I don't think I see that listed here.
Dina: It's a pass anyway.
Jonah: Ah.
Dina: Too worried about the bends.
Quote from Glenn
Glenn: One time, I gave $100 bill in change when it was only supposed to be 35 cents.
Amy: Oh.
Glenn: And then another time, I forgot to put anybody on the schedule, and I had to work the whole day alone in the store.
Amy: Hmm.
Glenn: And then, uh, and then one time I ate everybody's lunch by accident. And, um... Oh, I accidentally ordered some adult toys 'cause I thought they were puzzles.
Quote from Glenn
Amy: Okay, so, now I hit submit?
Glenn: Uh-buh-buh-buh! Euuuhh! A-C-E-S-T: "Always Check Everything Seven Times."
Amy: Really, seven times? Isn't that five or six times too many?
Glenn: You would be surprised how many mistakes I pick up on the seventh check.
Amy: Seven times, got it. Okay, and then I hit submit.
Glenn: Ah. Yes, but if you ever forget where you are, here's a little mnemonic device, you know, to help you remember. First ♫ Mark the unit's inventory price ♫ And unit quantity ♫ Then triple check the product name ♫ 'Cause thorough's what you want be ♫
Amy: Glenn, really, I-
Glenn: ♫ Then look it over ♫ One more time in case there's a mistake ♫ Then sign it, date it, click submit ♫ And throw it in the lake ♫ [talks] But don't do that last part, 'cause it's just for the rhyme.
Quote from Dina
Dina: Hey, I've been thinking about what you said, about how I should be ashamed of my job.
Jonah: Oh, I didn't actually mean you should be ashamed-
Dina: No, no, no. You were right to ridicule me in front of everyone. It was harsh but a real wake-up call.
Jonah: Okay, again, I wasn't trying to ridicule you. I-
Dina: Truth is, I don't wanna do this for the rest of my life. But I don't wanna be a manager either, so what do I do?
Jonah: I mean, you could do whatever you want.
Dina: Oh, really? Could I be a giraffe?
Jonah: Well, within reality.
Dina: Yeah, exactly. How quickly we go from "you can be whatever you wanna be" to "within reality." Okay, drop what you're doing. We have to figure this out.
Jonah: We?
Dina: It is the least you can do after the way you humiliated me. You can't just shiv someone and then walk away. You need to help mop up the blood. Mop up my blood, Jonah.
Quote from Cheyenne
Cheyenne: What if we call our business "Divinity"? But the word Divinity is written upside down.
Mateo: Mmm-hmm, love it, but also kind of hate it. What about "Just Us"?
Cheyenne: "Just Us" or just "Us"?
Mateo: Just- "Just Us."
Cheyenne: "Just Just Us" or just "Just Us"?
Garrett: Hey, any chance you guys could go talk over somebody else's head?
Mateo: Shh. We are trying to create a lifestyle brand slash multimedia platform.
Cheyenne: Yeah, you obviously don't get Chateo.
Mateo: Chateo! [laughs] [exclaims] I love it!
Cheyenne: I actually thought of it a while ago, but I was sitting on it, 'cause I just wanted it to, like, slip out and sound super casual.
Mateo: [laughs] Oh, my God!
Quote from Amy
Glenn: Okay, I have hidden several rule violations somewhere in this section. And, go.
Amy: That trash can is overflowing. That fluorescent light bulb is out. That mannequin's missing an arm. There is a bottle of grape soda that doesn't belong in women's wear and it's leaking. These sweaters aren't really folded. They're just sort of wadded up into balls. And Brett should be wearing a shirt.
Glenn: That was really good. You even found some I didn't notice. Okay, so, this next part is called: "Backwards and on Roller-Skates." 'Cause a great manager should be able to do this job backwards and on roller-skates.
Amy: Glenn, this really isn't necessary. I mean, I know all of this stuff, and what I don't know, I'm sure I'll learn in actual management training.
Glenn: So, you don't want my fake management training, is what you're saying.
Amy: I mean, I wanna say exactly, but I'm trying not to hurt your feelings.
Glenn: Sorry I wasted your time.
Amy: Brett, for future reference, if a manager asks you to take off your clothes, you can say no.
Quote from Dina
Jonah: Okay, what about professional flavor tester?
Dina: Pass. I don't want my sister's job.
Garrett: Maritime law?
Dina: Legislative or enforcement?
Garrett: Enforcement.
Dina: Pass.
Garrett: Legislative?
Dina: Also, pass.
Garrett: Why didn't you just say that to being with?
Dina: I'm trying to be open.
Quote from Dina
Jonah: Look, you can't expect to figure out your entire future in a day. I spent 200 grand on higher education, and I still haven't figured it out.
Dina: 200 grand? Your parents must be pissed.
Jonah: Nope. All student loans.
Dina: You have $200,000 in student loan debt? Ha! I mean, the interest on that alone must be more than you make here.
Jonah: Well, yeah. I mean, sure...
Dina: That means every single day, even after you've worked a full day, you are more in debt than you were the day before. [laughs]
Jonah: Uh-huh.
Dina: Wow, I thought I was in trouble, but... ha! I mean, you're just as lost as I am, and you're 2 hundy in the hole. That's pretty weird to think about, huh? [laughs]
Jonah: That is weird.
Quote from Mateo
Mateo: I feel like everyone works Monday to Friday, so we should do Tuesday, Thursday, Sunday from 10:00 pm to 2:00 am.
Cheyenne: Smart. Then we could do lots of business with Tokyo.
Mateo: Yes.
Quote from Marcus
Mateo: Okay, uh, what about this one? How does it make you feel?
Marcus: Scared.
Cheyenne: Interesting. You said the last one also made you feel scared.
Marcus: Yeah.
Mateo: Okay. And what about this one?
Marcus: Hey, is that the Pizza Hut font?
Mateo: Yes. Just how does it make you feel?
Marcus: Like, um... hungry.