Hyde: Oh, my God, what did I do?
Red: You married a Las Vegas stripper. Congratulations. With Eric gone, you're the town dumbass.

Red: [imitates engine running] So long, dumbass! [laughs]

Kitty: So, how did your brother take the news?
Red: Oh, you know Marty. He was talking about his feelings and then he started bawling, so I hung up on him. I'm not paying long distance rates to listen to that crap.
Laurie: Uncle Marty is so in touch with his feelings. It's like he's completely self-actualized.
Red: He's a dumbass.

[When Red and Kitty walk into the kitchen in the morning, Eric is passed out on the table wearing a woman's dress with black paint on his cheeks]
Kitty: Oh, good Lord.
Eric: [wakes up] What, what?
Red: Happy birthday, dumbass.

Kitty: So, how's the day going?
Red: Well, let's see. I interviewed fifteen potential employees. 10 dumbasses, four cretins and a mama's boy.
Kitty: I vote for the mama's boy. I think they're sweet.

Charlie: Well, howdy, newcomers. I'm Charlie Miller. You can call me Charlie. This is my son, Mitch.
Mitch: You can call me "ladies man."
Charlie: "Ladies man."
Mitch: Did somebody call me?
Red: I'm Red Forman. This is my son, Eric. You can call him dumbass.
Charlie: Well, we don't use the A-S-S word. We have a reputation to uphold.
Mitch: We're the two-time champs.
Charlie: Little secret, Red. I tell Mitch it doesn't matter how we do as long as we're together.
Mitch: And why is that, Dad?
Charlie: 'Cause we bad!
Mitch: Oh, yeah, that's right! We bad!
Charlie: We bad!
Eric: All right. Dad, they have a catch phrase. Hey, what's ours?
Red: Shut up, dumbass.
Eric: Yeah. Shut up, dumbass. Okay. Yeah.