Red Quote #88
Quote from Red in Grandma's Dead
Kitty: So, how did your brother take the news?
Red: Oh, you know Marty. He was talking about his feelings and then he started bawling, so I hung up on him. I'm not paying long distance rates to listen to that crap.
Laurie: Uncle Marty is so in touch with his feelings. It's like he's completely self-actualized.
Red: He's a dumbass.
Features in the collection: Red Forman: Dumbass Quotes.
That '70s Show Quotes
‘Red Forman: Dumbass Quotes’
Quote from Red in The Battle of Evermore
Red: So, I guess this is the way an immature, engaged, high school dumbass with no car, no job and no money trims the hedges.
Hyde: That was like eight burns in one sentence.
Donna: An octo-burn. Let's get the hell out of here.
Quote from Red in Sally Simpson
Red: You think my problem is my own son? My son is a fine young man.
Eric: Wow, Dad, you don't have...
Red: Shut up, dumbass. You know less about my family than you do about football! Which isn't saying much, since you dropped every pass that came near you! And let me tell you something else. When a real Packer hurts his leg, he stuffs his kneecap back in and keeps on running!
Eric: That's what this little mushroom would have done.
‘Grandma's Dead’ Quotes
Quote from Red
Kitty: Now, Red, honey I don't think that you're really mad at Marty, I think you are just going through one of the five stages of dealing with death.
Red: What are you talking about?
Kitty: There are five stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance.
Red: Kitty, I've got two stages: anger and drinking.
Quote from Hyde
Eric: Donna, we don't talk about things in the Forman family. It's not like your house, where every time you have a "feeling", your dad gives you a big hug and a gold star.
Donna: I'm just trying to help you here.
Eric: Well, I don't- Talking isn't gonna help me, okay? What's gonna help me is, like, drinking.
Donna: Well, now you're just being stupid.
Hyde: [enters] Hey, Forman, let's go get wasted.
Donna: Great.
Eric: See? Hyde's a real friend. He's gonna help me get through my grandma's death.
Hyde: Your grandma's dead? Oh, man. Let's go get wasted.
Quote from Red
Kitty: Oh, here, Bernice, I made you a plate of leftovers.
Bernice: Thank you. Oh, that reminds me, Red, my garbage disposal is still broken.
Kitty: Well, just as long as you enjoy it.
Bernice: Listen, I've got an idea. Let's eat out next Sunday. That way everybody can get something they like.
Eric: Okay, Grandma, time to get you home.
Red: Eric, you gotta warm that car up for at least 10 minutes.
Bernice: Oh, he's a good boy. It's just a shame he doesn't have a better home life. You know, Kitty, when I was raising children, the right way- [Kitty closes the car door]
Red: That's warm enough, Eric.
Eric: But you just said-
Red: Show me tail lights.