Red: So, I guess this is the way an immature, engaged, high school dumbass with no car, no job and no money trims the hedges.
Hyde: That was like eight burns in one sentence.
Donna: An octo-burn. Let's get the hell out of here.

Red: You know, we're getting killed here thanks to your screwing up that last event. All you had to do was build a cabin out of Lincoln Logs.
Eric: Well, I thought I'd score some extra points by building the Millennium Falcon.
Red: The Millennium what? If that's a Star Wars thing, I'm gonna kick you in the ass.
Eric: It's not a Star Wars thing. It's a very rare falcon that can do the Kessel Run in under six parsecs.

[circle:]
Hyde: I can't close my mouth. Can you close your mouth? It's really starting to freak me out. Leo's the best.
Kelso: Leo made me a grilled cheese once. He used butter and made the crust extra toasty. He forgot cheese. I'm gonna miss that grilled-cheese-making son of a bitch.
Jackie: You know, one time, I heard Leo talking on the phone and he was speaking Chinese. So I said, "Leo, stop speaking Chinese." So he turned around, and it wasn't Leo. It was a Chinese guy. [sighs] You know, I'll never forget that.
Fez: I'm just sad I'll never get to see his face when I tell him I did it with Nina. Actually, I'd like to see my face when I do it with Nina. I bet I look like a stallion.
Hyde: So today we sit in this circle in honor of Leo. He was my boss. He was my friend. He was my connection. To Leo.
All: To Leo!

Hyde: You're talking about him like he's gone, man. He would have told me if he was leaving town.
Kelso: Maybe a U.F.O. appeared. And it shot down a beam and made everyone and everything inside the Fotohut vanish. Yeah, like an apparition.
Hyde: Kelso, you don't even know what an apparition is.
Kelso: Hey, if I can't use words I don't understand this is gonna be one quiet afternoon.

Hyde: Really, he just left? He didn't call or anything?
Jackie: Oh, Steven, I'm sorry.
Kelso: Don't take it personal, Hyde. You know Leo never liked phones. He said he could hear voices in them.

Eric: Well, I'm sorry. I know you think I'm a disappointment and stuff.
Red: Hey. I'm proud of how we did. Look, I know what it's like to have your dad riding you all the time. My old man was always on me to go to engineering school. And when I didn't, he was so mad we didn't talk for a year.
Eric: So, you're the softy in your family?
Red: See, my dad's vision for my life was wrong. Only I knew what was best. Not my dad. You understand what I'm saying?
Eric: Wow. Are- Are you admitting that you're wrong that it's okay for me and Donna to get married?
Red: What? No, no. I'm saying that my dad was wrong and I was right. Just like I'm right now. The point is, I'm always right, so break it off!

Hyde: Well, we couldn't find Leo. We just checked all his hangouts.
Jackie: The Hub.
Hyde: Alley behind The Hub.
Jackie: Fatso Burger.
Hyde: Alley behind the Fatso Burger.

Eli: By the way, he left a note. Do any of you know a kid named Heidi?
Hyde: He means Hyde. That's me, man. [excitedly] The note's for me! [calmly] I mean, the note's for me. [clears throat] "Dear Hyde, man. One day I stopped in Point Place for some gas. Before I knew it, eight years had passed. Whoa. That rhymes. Anyway, I should get home to my wife. Take care. You're a good kid, man. You're a good kid, man." See, I told you he wouldn't leave without saying good-bye.
Jackie: Oh, Steven, you really do love that old, dirty, little hippie.
Eli: And, uh, he left you something else. He said that you liked "film," if you know what I mean.
Hyde: All right. I was hoping we could take something home, put it in the shirt pocket. [chuckles] Holy hell!

Red: Eric, what are you doing eating?
Eric: Well, it's mainly for survival. But I also enjoy the fruity taste.
Red: I told you to replace the hubcap on the Vista Cruiser. So, what is it? You're mature enough to get married but not mature enough to replace a hubcap?
Eric: Well, let's see. You took away my keys, so I can't drive. And you took away my job, so I can't afford a new hubcap. You also took away my self-esteem, so I have no pride in my job or my possessions.
Kitty: For gosh sake, you've been arguing for two weeks. Now stop it. Help me with this crossword puzzle. I need a four-letter word for disappointment.
Red: Eric.
Kitty: [gasps] It fits. Well, now, that can't be right.

Eric: So, he's like, "Replace the hubcap." And I'm like, "Hey, why don't you replace the hubcap." And that is why I'm trimming the hedges.
Kelso: Yeah. I only mess with Red when I really need the discipline. He's a total hard-ass.
Fez: Hard-ass? Take another look, my friend. It jiggles when he wiggles.