Donna: And that's game! Man, what a slaughter. I just wiped the court with you, from one end to the other. Whoo!
Eric: I gotta go inside, but I'll leave the light on. I don't want you to gloat in the dark.
Donna: Well, hey, Eric, don't you want your balls back?
Eric: Okay, now look, that's a little uncalled for. [Donna holds up two basketballs] Oh, uh, yeah. Thanks.

[circle:]
Kelso: Donna beat you in basketball?
Fez: Is this true, Eric?
Eric: Yeah. What, is that a big deal?
Hyde: Of course not. Unless Donna happens to be, you know, a girl.
Kelso: Especially a girl you love.
Fez: You know, in my country, if a woman beats you it makes her want you.
Eric: Really?
Fez: Yes, but this is America, wuss.

Red: I think we got it.
Kitty: That's lovely, Red.
Red: Solid as a rock.
Kitty: It sure is. Thank you. Now...
[Kitty cautiously places a pitcher of orange juice and glass on the table, she watches them closing as she steps back towards the kitchen counter.]
Kitty: Why don't you go watch TV, while I get lunch ready?
[After she puts a large melon on the table, Kitty is afraid to let her hand go and instead tries to stretch to reach something from the counter with her other hand.]
Red: Kitty, take your hand off of that melon.
Kitty: You know, you haven't gone fishing...
Red: Kitty, take your hand off that melon.
[After Kitty removes her hand, the melon rolls straight off the table onto the floor]

Bob: Well, I gotta get back to work. Midge, this table is a little wobbly. Stick some sugar packets under it, will you?

Midge: [answers phone] Hello?
Jackie: Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
Midge: Donna, it's for you.
Donna: [takes phone] Hello?
Jackie: You beat Eric at basketball! How could that happen?
Donna: So I beat Eric at basketball. What's the big deal?
Jackie: Eric will never be your boyfriend if you keep beating him at stuff. Okay, it is like in West Side Story. Now, if Maria beat Tony at one-on-one, they would have never fallen in love.
Donna: Yeah, and Tony never would have been killed in that knife fight.
Jackie: And neither will Eric if you're not careful.
Donna: No. Don't worry about it. Someone will stab Eric. Bye.

Jackie: [on the phone] Okay, she was going like, "That is so gross!" And I went like, "It takes one to know one!" And she was like, "Nuh-uh," and I went, "Yeah, uh-huh."
Kelso: Uh-huh.
Hyde: Man, are you still on the phone? Come on, let's go.
Kelso: I can't.
Hyde: The movie starts in, like, five minutes. Let's go.
Kelso: I can't.
Hyde: Wuss.
Kelso: Jackie, hold on. [covers the phone speaker] Okay, I'll tell her there's an emergency and I gotta go. She'll buy that, right?
Hyde: Yeah, except for one thing. [moves Kelso's hand to cover the microphone]
Jackie: [gasps] [hangs up]

Red: Bingo. [sits down at the table] Ah, crud.
Kitty: No, no, no, no. Now look. We'll get rid of these chairs and we will sit on the floor like those nice Japanese people in Flower Drum Song.
Red: I'll have to make new legs for that damn thing. I'll be in the garage if you need me.
Kitty: Okay, well, now, you take your time and you do a good job. You call me if you need anything.
Red: Ssh.
Kitty: I mean, if-
Red: Ssh. Is it me, or is that refrigerator too loud?
Kitty: What refrigerator? Red, there is no noise. There is no noise. [sings] You'll be swell You'll be great Gonna have the whole world on a plate...

Eric: Have you been standing there the whole time?
Kitty: No, I came out to get one of your father's tools. He's in there working on my refrigerator. So I gather you and Donna are going through a rough patch.
Eric: No, Mom, we're in a school play about two people who hate each other.
Kitty: Oh. Okay, Mr. Smartmouth but when you get older, you are going to realize that it's pretty silly to get upset about losing a game to your girlfriend.
Eric: You know what? I don't want to talk to you about this.
Kitty: Well, you know what, I don't want to talk to you about this. But I will tell you one thing. Your father and I have played many, many games over the years and we never kept score and we always had fun. Now what did I come out here for? Oh, your father's fixing my refrigerator. [picks up a sledgehammer and hits the side of the garage door] Red, honey, forget the refrigerator. There's something wrong with the garage door.

Jackie: Michael. We need to talk. And I am over here.
Kelso: [quietly] Oh God. What am I gonna do?
Hyde: You could, and I know this is a radical suggestion but be a man?
Kelso: You're right, Hyde. No more excuses. [walks over to Jackie]
Fez: She will crush him, yes?
Hyde: Like the spirit of your Mayan forefathers.
Fez: My forefathers were not Mayan.
Hyde: [scoffs] Like anyone cares.

Jackie: So, Michael.
Kelso: So, Jackie. [Hyde gestures for Kelso to be strong] I didn't mean to make you hang up on me. I'm sorry. It will never happen again.
Jackie: That's okay. You were obviously under a bad influence. [looks at Hyde]
Kelso: Yeah.
Jackie: I'm thirsty. Michael, get me a pop.
[Jackie celebrates her success as she passes Hyde and Fez]
Hyde: I'm sorry. I remember saying, be a man, not be a wuss.
Fez: I am ashamed to know you.
Kelso: Uh-huh. Uh-huh. [Kelso raises his hand] All right, all those who are getting some, hands up. [Hyde and Fez remain still] Anybody else? Getting some? Hyde? Fez? Yeah.