Jackie Quote #16

Quote from Jackie in Battle of the Sexists

Midge: [answers phone] Hello?
Jackie: Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
Midge: Donna, it's for you.
Donna: [takes phone] Hello?
Jackie: You beat Eric at basketball! How could that happen?
Donna: So I beat Eric at basketball. What's the big deal?
Jackie: Eric will never be your boyfriend if you keep beating him at stuff. Okay, it is like in West Side Story. Now, if Maria beat Tony at one-on-one, they would have never fallen in love.
Donna: Yeah, and Tony never would have been killed in that knife fight.
Jackie: And neither will Eric if you're not careful.
Donna: No. Don't worry about it. Someone will stab Eric. Bye.

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 ‘Battle of the Sexists’ Quotes

Quote from Fez

[circle:]
Eric: Wait, wait, wait. What about Kelso? I mean, Jackie has him totally whipped.
Fez: Whipped like the family pig.
Kelso: I am not pig-whipped. Where do you even get that stuff?
Hyde: Are you kidding? [as Jackie] Michael, call me at 8:00.
Eric: [as Jackie] Michael, do your Chico impression.
Fez: [as Jackie] Michael, rub oil on my thighs while I spank you.
[The camera pans around to Kelso, Hyde and then Eric, who are all stunned into silence]
Fez: Please, someone else talk now.

Quote from Red

Red: Is this table wobbling?
Kitty: I don't think so.
Red: No, no, no, no. It's definitely wobbling.
Kitty: Well, honey, anything will wobble if you shake it hard enough.
Red: Give me a hand, Eric. We'll flip this thing over.
Kitty: Honey, honey, we're eating. We're eating.
Eric: Yeah, let's just put a sugar packet under it.
Red: Sugar packet? That's what's wrong with this country, Eric. Nobody wants to roll up their sleeves and work. They're all looking for their sugar packet solution. Well, not me. I'm getting the saw. [exits]
Eric: Mom, has Dad gone crazy?
Kitty: I'm afraid so, dear.

Quote from Midge

Midge: Honey, I think your annoying friend is right.
Donna: What?
Midge: Certain things change.
Donna: Eric and I have been playing games our whole lives. And sometimes he wins, and sometimes I win.
Midge: No, I mean the rules change. Women have to pretend to be weak and fragile so that men can feel superior.
Donna: That's insane. If women don't learn to stand up for themselves, men will always control the world.
Midge: Oh, honey. Men don't control the world.