Estelle Costanza: People take buses to get that rye.
George: Maybe they forgot to put it out!
Frank Costanza: Ah, they didn't forget to put it out! It's deliberate! Deliberate, I tell you!

Frank Costanza: George, as you may be aware, your mother and I are not moving to Del Boca Vista, Florida.
George: I am aware.
Frank Costanza: So, I was wondering, would it be okay if I turned your room into a billiard parlor?
George: A billiard parlor?
Frank Costanza: Regulation table with a hi-fi, maybe even a bar. Give it some real authenticity.

Estelle Costanza: What's going on in here? Are you two still playing?! You've been up here three hours!
Frank Costanza: We still haven't finished the first game.
Estelle Costanza: The first game?!
Kramer: Well, we're still, uh, learning the subtleties of the table.
Frank Costanza: He knows the Maestro. He could have the picture..
Estelle Costanza: Oh, forget about it. It's not your cousin.
Frank Costanza: [yells] You don't know that!

Frank Costanza: His name was Carlo Costanza. We played together everyday until I was four. If I could just look through your photographs, maybe I could recognize him.
Maestro: Unfortunately, those photographs are at home.
Kramer: Well, listen, if you bring them by, maybe we could interest you in a game of pool. Yeah, Frank here, he's got his own billiard room.
Frank Costanza: Yes, It's, uh, it's.. uh, uh.. What do you call it, Kramer?
Kramer: A billiard room.
Frank Costanza: No, not billiard. Not billiards. It was... Come on, already. Come on...
Kramer: What?
Frank Costanza: We call it.. The, uh...
Kramer: [snaps fingers] The place to be!
Frank Costanza: The place to be! Yes, it's the place to be.

Frank Costanza: Carlo! It's me, Frank! [attempts to hug him] I'm your cousin, Frank! Aren't you Carlo?
Man: Carlo? No. Mio nome è Giuseppe.
Frank Costanza: What do you know. All right. [picks up his present] I guess I was wrong. [walks away]

Kramer: Hey.
Frank Costanza: You still need a cook?
Kramer: Oh, yeah, come on in, Frank.
Frank Costanza: You got Tefal?
Kramer: No, Calphalon.
Frank Costanza: No! Follow me.

Elaine: You're quitting?
Eddie: I can't churn out that pointless drivel any more.
Elaine: Well, you can't quit. You're all I've got. I need you!
[As Elaine grabs Eddie by the lapels and shakes him, Eddie chokes on a piece of food. Frank sees this and flashes back to Korea. An alarmed Frank runs around knocking plates away from everyone.]
Frank Costanza: No! Don't eat that. It's no good. No good.
Kramer: Frank, stop it.
Frank Costanza: No way. [flips the buffet table]

Kramer: Hey Frank, you got two beds in here.
Frank Costanza: That's right. That's me on the left.
Kramer: So, you sleep in separate beds?
Frank Costanza: Thirty years ago, we came to an agreement. It was the only way I could get some rest.
Kramer: [intrigued] Really?
Frank Costanza: Estelle's got the jimmy arms.
Kramer: You can get that in your arms?
Frank Costanza: Like you wouldn't believe.

George: Well, I've given this a lot of thought, and I've gotta say... As as I'd like to see the two of you living it up in a warm, tropical, setting, I, I would just miss you too much. So, I've decided, I want you to stay.
Frank Costanza: It's too late. We bought a condo at Del Boca Vista. We're leaving tonight.
George: But you said it was my call.
Estelle Costanza: We were just being nice. Cosmo, are you sure you're gonna be all right here alone?
Kramer: Oh, yeah, yeah. I got Emily coming over tonight.
George: You're letting him have a woman over?!
Frank Costanza: He's not family. It's different, psychologically.

Estelle Costanza: How many times can you check the car?
Frank Costanza: I saw a bum sleeping in a Cadillac the other day.
Estelle Costanza: Why would someone break into a car to take a nap?
Frank Costanza: They don't nap. They make it their home. They urinate in there!
Estelle Costanza: You're driving me crazy!
Frank Costanza: That's it. We're going back to Queens. Where's my hat?
Estelle Costanza: No!