‘The Prettiest Boy in School’
Season 8, Episode 2 - Aired October 21, 2020
When Adam starts his senior year in high school with a new look, he tries to bridge the gap between his old friends and his cool new friends. Meanwhile, Barry and Erica quickly regress when they return home for a week before they go back to college.
Quote from Barry
Barry: Don't screw this up for us, Schwartz, just because you don't have a mom.
Geoff: I have a mom. Her name is Linda, and you know her well. I-I'm just saying maybe you should pump the brakes a little before this gets weird.
Barry: [chuckles] She's really poppin' my toe knuckles. Now I get why you married her, Dad.
Murray: Yeah, I'm really living the dream.
Quote from Dave Kim
Adult Adam: [v.o.] While Barry and Erica were moving backwards, I was looking forward to seeing my old friends.
Adam: What's up, nerds? I mean, fellow nerds. I mean, who wants to play the sequel we've all been waiting for, Super Mario 2?
Dave Kim: We beat that months ago.
Emmy: We're on Super Mario 3 now.
Adam: There's an S.M.3?
Matthew: Not in America. But my brother's teaching English in Japan, and he sent over a copy.
Dave Kim: We've been learning Japanese all summer to get ready for it.
Adam: You need to know Japanese to play?
Matthew: [speaks Japanese] [Dave and Emmy laugh]
Adam: Wow, I really missed a lot.
Dave Kim: You really did, dude.
Adam: Well, I'm here now, and I'm excited to fully hang with my nerd herd. I don't know why I keep insulting you.
Quote from Pops
Adam: My life is ruined!
Pops: Whatever it is, look on the bright side. You can still digest cheese.
Adam: Will you take this seriously? I came back from summer looking like a bronze Ricky Schroder, and now the popular kids want me bad.
Pops: While I don't entirely follow, that does not sound like a problem.
Adam: Are you kidding? I belong on the hood of a car in a Whitesnake video!
Pops: You do have a nice way about you.
Quote from Barry
Adam: And now all my old friends have moved on without me.
Barry: Welcome to my world.
Adam: Why are you wrapped up like that?
Barry: Mom swaddled me for warmth. But now is the time for cold, harsh truths. Your old friendships are dead. They can't relate to what you and I are... Kings among men.
Quote from Pops
Pops: I hear you. When I got back from the war, my banjo buddies could not relate to my army buddies. Eventually, we had to find a mutual joy. Turns out it was banana cream pies.
Adam: That's it! If I want everyone to be friends, I just have to find common ground!
Pops: I just told you, banana cream pies.
Adam: I-I'll give it five more minutes, but thanks!
Quote from Beverly
Virginia Kremp: Um, what's happening here?
Geoff: Oh, uh, Barry, Erica, and Mrs. G are trapped in this cycle of codependence that's growing worse by the hour. I call it the "Great Regression," but I'm open to pitches.
Beverly: Here's a pitch. Shut your dumb hole.
Linda Schwartz: Bevy! That's my son!
Beverly: Okay, but I only get my babies for one week this summer. I'm making the most of it.
Virginia Kremp: Beverly, they're adults, and you deserve to have an adult relationship. I've developed one with my boys, and it's one of the things I'm most proud of.
Beverly: Well, I know it's not your hedges.
Virginia Kremp: You never returned my clippers!
Beverly: Okay, this magazine club is over. Uh, I've got babies to tend to.
Quote from Murray
Adult Adam: [v.o.] While my mom realized her kids were out of control, I was trying to take control of my social life.
Adam: Thanks for coming. How are the refreshments?
Dave Kim: He took my Capri Sun.
JC Spink: Only to wash down your cookie.
Dave Kim: Why are we here?
Murray: I was about to ask the same thing.
Adam: There are like ten other rooms in this house, Dad. You can go anytime.
Murray: You called my bluff.
Quote from Murray
Adam: We're here to find common ground between all my friends. JC, you're the epitome of cool.
JC Spink: It's obvious, but I do like to hear it out loud.
Adam: A-And, Dave Kim, you're the epitome of...
Dave Kim: What? Say it.
Murray: I'll say it. Loser. Putz. Schmuck. Dork. Doof. Dink. Schmo. Dingus. Goober.
Adam: We get it, Don Rickles.
Murray: Dorf.
Quote from Adam
Adult Adam: [v.o.] So we set out to list everything cool kids and geeks like.
Dave Kim: Falkor The Luck Dragon.
JC Spink: Casually mooning an old-folks bus?
Murray: The peaceful din of an empty room.
Dave Kim: Creating a woman in a computer program to give you compliments.
JC Spink: Throwing javelins at trees.
Murray: Guests who know when they've outstayed their welcome.
Dave Kim: Video games. Comics. Star Wars.
JC Spink: Great white sharks. Snow leopards. Kodiak bears!
Murray: What is this again?
JC Spink: We're naming apex predators.
Adam: No, we're not.
Quote from Adam
Brea: Adam, w-why are you trying so hard to bring everyone together?
Adam: I love spending time with you and your friends, but I miss my old friends. There's got to be a way I can have it all, like Melanie Griffith in Working Girl.
Brea: That's sweet. And weird.