Adult Adam: [v.o.] And so, I followed my wise older sister's advice and acted like nothing had happened, which was harder than I thought.
Mr. Woodburn: Today we will be discussing The Tell-Tale Heart, the story of a man whose guilt over a lie leads to his insanity.
Adam: Ah, no.
Brea: You okay?
Mr. Woodburn: Yeah, what are you, some kind of liar who keeps hearing a beating heart?
Adam: What? No!
Mr. Woodburn: Just some Tell-Tale Heart humor. I thought you read the story, or were you lying? Bum-bum, bum-bum, bum-bum. [students laugh] FYI... I've had three heart attacks, so if you see me clutch my chest again, you call a nurse.

Brea: Hey! Off to my weekend at Brown. I'm gonna miss you.
Adam: Please have so much fun that you don't even think about me.
Brea: Wow. That's surprisingly mature of you.
Adam: Yep, I'm super mature. I'm basically an old man. I'm George Burns over here. "Oh, God!", "Oh, God! Book II," "Oh, God!
You Devil." All the vaguely comedic greats.
Brea: Odd tangent, but honestly, I'm too excited about my trip to question it.
Adam: Funny you should mention honesty because I'm a big fan.
Brea: Okay. See ya Monday.

Murray: I know you did it.
Adam: I did! I'm guilty! I'm so, so guilty!
Murray: You kicked the plug out of the wall, you moron.
Adam: Oh. That? Yes. I'm sorry you had to stand.
Murray: Do better.

Joanne: You think I would break up with you over this?
Barry: But it's the opposite of the me that you and the world have fallen in love with.
Joanne: You should be proud of all sides of your hot, bonkers self.
Barry: Really?
Joanne: Really.
Barry: Okay then. [mumbles] I love ice dancing.
Joanne: You don't need to mumble it. Say it loud, say it proud.
Barry: [normal voice] I love ice dancing.
Joanne: More. Make it uncomfortable.
Barry: [shouts] I love ice dancing!
Joanne: There you go!
Barry: Oh, my God.
Joanne: Yeah.
Barry: That feels so good! Joanne.
Joanne: Hmm?
Barry: You lifted a great weight from my super-jacked shoulders. [shouts in the hallway] I love ice dancing!

Adult Adam: [v.o.] While Joanne helped Barry live his truth, I was still living with the weight of my own lie. Until this.
Brea: I kissed someone at Brown!
Adam: Oh, my God!
Brea: We were doing karaoke, and... and I got caught up in the moment and... and the song ended, and he kissed me.
Adam: Sweet! I did the exact same thing last week at NYU.
Brea: Wait, what?
Adam: This is perfect. I did some smooching, you did some smooching. We're even-stevens.
Brea: You're happy about this?
Adam: Totally! Now we can both wipe our dubious slates clean. Ooh, boy, what a relief.
Brea: Hold on. You kissed someone over a week ago and you were never gonna tell me?
Adam: I just did.
Brea: Only because I told you I kissed someone.
Adam: Exactly. We're both awful, baby. Forgive. Forget. Even-stevens.
Brea: I felt horrible, and I told you immediately. And you were just gonna keep this from me forever?
Adam: Not forever. Just TBD.
Brea: I have to think about this. [walks off]
Adam: What's to think about?! Even-stevens.

Barry: You're not enraged at my betrayal of all that is macho?
Vic: Why would you ever keep your love for ice dancing a secret? In fact, many moons ago, I was a competitive ice dancer.
Bill Lewis: More secrets revealed.
Vic: I've talked about this many times.
Bill Lewis: You're a friend of a friend. How much am I really expected to invest?
Vic: I was one-half of the Torvill and Dean of Canada. Tremblay and Brown. Now... rest in peace, Tremblay. You skate with the angels now.

Beverly: While I've enjoyed keeping our secret, it'll be nice not to have to watch from the shadows anymore.
Barry: And I owe it all to Joanne. She is the wind beneath my ice dancing wings.
Beverly: Moving past that controversial comment, no, we're gonna watch up here tonight instead of in the basement hot tub, where we pretend we're just "having a normal mother-son soak."
Barry: Correction... Joanne will share in our passion from here on out. I can't wait to tell her. [sighs] Bye! [exits]
Beverly: What the [bleep] just happened?

Joanne: I'm remembering I have a lot of homework.
Barry: Aw, no, no, come on, we haven't even gotten to the judges' results yet.
Joanne: Seems like maybe it should just be between the two of you.
Beverly: Her words, not mine. But also my words.
Barry: Mom! What's wrong with you?
Beverly: What's wrong with your girlfriend who doesn't know a leap from a Lutz?
Barry: That's what this is? You're jealous of Joanne?
Beverly: I thought ice dancing was our thing. But I guess you don't see it that way.
Barry: Fine. Go. But just like when Dean frosted his hair right before Innsbrook in '84, you surprised me tonight, Mom.

Adam: Thank you for coming here to brainstorm how to undo the damage I've done with Brea. So far, my only idea is "build a time machine."
Geoff: I once built a soapbox car for a derby. But my dad did most of the work. We came in eleventh.
Adam: Great, Geoff, quick question... if you were me, how would you sum up that nonsense for the chalkboard?
Geoff: Sorry, but this never would have happened if you would have just listened to my advice and come clean right away.
Erica: Please, none of this would have happened if you'd stuck with my advice and never said anything.
Geoff: That's insane!
Erica: Is it? He could have kept his secret forever and then had power over Brea because of her indiscretion.
Geoff: Are you the devil?
Erica: That was one Halloween, and PS, buddy, you liked that costume a lot.

Geoff: Please don't listen to my wayward fiancee. What you need to do is throw yourself at Brea's feet and tell her the kiss meant nothing.
Adam: I would love that, but I kinda have a credibility issue. She won't believe anything I say. But there might be someone she would believe. [runs off]
Geoff: Do you think he's going to track down Morganna?
Erica: Would you like him to?
Geoff: No! Yes! Maybe! Her proportions are ridiculous, but I'm intrigued by her eager spirit.