‘A Chorus Lie’
Season 3, Episode 2 - Aired September 30, 2015
As Adam enters puberty, Beverly does everything in her power to help him through this awkward phase, including his crackling singing voice. So when Adam gets a lead role in the school musical, Beverly convinces Ms. Cinoman to have Adam lip sync - just like the musical group Milli Vanilli - while performing in "A Chorus Line." Meanwhile, Murray inspires Erica to go to the Homecoming Dance with JTP member Geoff Schwartz.
Quote from Adam
Pops: Tough day at the office, kiddo?
Adam: The worst. I got the lead in the musical.
Beverly: Schmoo, that's fantastic. That's all you've ever wanted.
Adam: Not any more. My face is breaking out, my pits are stinking, and my voice is very, very unpredictable. I finally get the part of a lifetime and I'm just gonna humiliate myself.
Pops: Ah, yes. The wondrous journey through puberty.
Adam: It's not wondrous. It's awful.
Quote from Adam
Pops: But this is just something all of us had to suffer through on our own. Now you will too.
Beverly: Or completely skip over. With my guidance, I'll take this horrible time and make it smooth, easy and maybe a little bit fun.
Adam: Are you actually saying you could save me from puberty?
Pops: No! She can't.
Beverly: Yes, that is exactly what I'm saying.
Adam: At this point, I've got nothing left to lose. Show me what you got, lady.
Quote from Geoff
Geoff: Greetings and salutations. A lovely home you've got here.
Murray: What's going on? Why are you talking like a jack-ass?
Geoff: Erica said she wanted a Christian Slater, so here I am. I know it's a long-shot, but I just think your daughter's amazing. And if you approve, I'd love to take her to Homecoming.
Murray: Erica! You've got a gentleman suitor.
Geoff: You're one of the good ones, Mr. G.
Quote from Barry
Murray: Wow. Who knew so many interesting and attractive young men went to this school.
Barry: They're okay, I guess.
Murray: Yeah. Lots of fellas who look like they'd be worth getting to know.
Barry: I should put myself out there more.
Murray: Oh, look at that one with the stylish scarf and the sketchbook. A poet and an artist, I bet.
Barry: That's Dan. He's shy but I bet I could crack open that nut.
Murray: Hey, how about that hot shot? Is he a swimmer? He's built like a swimmer.
Barry: Look at those shoulders. He swims for sure.
Murray: Will you shut up? I'm not even talking to you!
Erica: Well, I certainly hope you're not talking to me.
Quote from Barry
Murray: Hey, take it from someone who doesn't like people. If you close yourself off, you're gonna miss out on a lot.
Erica: So my dad wants me to date more?
Murray: It's Homecoming. There's got to be a nice guy somewhere who deserves a chance.
Barry: You're right! I'm going to go ask Dan to sit with me at lunch. See what makes that guy tick. Thanks, Dad.
Quote from Lainey
Lainey: Yes! This is amazing. Your dad actually provided you with real wisdom for once.
Quote from Beverly
Adam: What kind of sorcery is this? My giant zits are gone.
Beverly: Momma made you a promise. Now your adorable punim is ready to light up that stage.
Quote from Murray
Murray: Who the hell is that?
Erica: My date to the dance on Saturday. He wanted to hang.
Murray: That kid's your date? He's a moron.
Erica: Well, you're the guy who told me to give the morons a chance.
Murray: But I meant other morons.
Erica: What other morons?
Murray: Nice morons. Morons like that Geoff kid.
Erica: Schwartz? He's a moron!
Murray: They're all morons. That's what I'm saying. But any other moron is better than that moron.
Quote from Erica
Erica: Are you taking both of us to the dance?
Jonny Atkins: Classic Jonny Atkins, am I right? How could you not see this coming?
Erica: Because I have no idea who you are, other than an oddly confident band geek.
Jonny Atkins: Shows what you know. Band geek in the front, rock god in the back.
Quote from Beverly
Pops: Bevvy, you can't let him go through with this cockamamie scheme.
Beverly: Well, actually, it was my idea.