‘My Best Friend's Mistake’
Season 1, Episode 3 - Aired October 9, 2001
When J.D. thinks Turk might be responsible for one of his patient's condition, he not only questions Turk's abilities as a surgeon but also their friendship. Meanwhile, Elliot confronts Dr. Kelso when he calls her sweetheart.
Quote from J.D.
J.D.: We should celebrate. Tear it up like we used to, just the two of us.
Turk: What comes before Part B?
J.D.: Part A! That's right, we used to tear it up. We should probably never do that again.
Quote from Janitor
Turk: [echoes] That song is like a virus.
Janitor: [singing] Oh, baby, please Give a little respect to me
Quote from Turk
Turk: What do you want to watch?
J.D.: Fletch.
Turk: Fletch it is.
J.D.: Seen it.
Turk: Well, you haven't seen it with us saying all the lines.
Carla: I'm so lucky I met you.
Quote from J.D.
J.D.: [v.o.] It's never easy to see a patient who's getting worse instead of better. In fact, that's kind of the opposite of what we're going for.
Quote from Nurse Roberts
Nurse Roberts: I've seen this before. Gauze, sponges, some young surgeon left something in this man.
J.D.: No. No, I know the guy that closed. He'd never be that careless.
Turk: Okay. Excuse me, sorry. Has anyone seen my keys? No? Okay, how about my wallet? Anyone?
J.D.: I've never seen that before.
Nurse Roberts: [singing] Oh, baby, please Give a little respect To Me
Quote from Janitor
J.D.: Have you seen Turk?
Janitor: Yeah, I saw him. He just went out that door.
[After J.D. walks through the door, he can't see Turk anywhere. The door closes behind him and he realizes he's stuck out on the through. He starts to bang on the door and scream.]
Janitor: Can't hear you. What?
J.D.: Let me in!
Janitor: You love who?
Quote from Todd
Turk: I gotta go. I gotta go. But you played a good game.
Todd: I thought you sucked.
J.D.: Go get your grub on.
Todd: Eh. [singing] Give a little respect To the Todd [talking] Hey, baby. What's up?
Woman: You gotta be kidding.
Quote from Carla
Carla: [singing] Oh, baby, refrain From breaking my heart I'm so in love with you
Quote from Ted
Ted: [singing] I hear you calling Oh, baby, please Give a little respect to me [talking] Thank you very much.
Quote from Ted
J.D.: Hi, how are you? I have a quick legal question. I'm just curious. What if, hypothetically...
Ted: Oh, God! You killed somebody.
J.D.: No!
Ted: Someone else did.
J.D.: No, no one killed anyone.
Ted: Maimed, mutilated, disfigured. Let's not split hairs.
J.D.: No, I'm not sure there is a problem. I'm running tests, I'm doing everything I should.
Ted: Look, if you know something, by not reporting it you're every bit as culpable. Now, is there anything you wanna tell me?
J.D.: [v.o.] Why am I protecting Turk when he can't give me five seconds?
Ted: Anything at all?
J.D.: [v.o.] Tell him.
J.D.: No.
Ted: [sigh of relief] Scared the hell out of me. [pops pill]