‘My Best Friend's Mistake’
Season 1, Episode 3 - Aired October 9, 2001
When J.D. thinks Turk might be responsible for one of his patient's condition, he not only questions Turk's abilities as a surgeon but also their friendship. Meanwhile, Elliot confronts Dr. Kelso when he calls her sweetheart.
Quote from J.D.
Nurse Roberts: Oh, and the blood work came back.
J.D.: Negative? But the guy looks like death.
Patient: Hi!
J.D.: What happened?
Carla: There's no infection. He's diabetic. So when someone gave him insulin during post-op, when he wasn't eating, he became hypoglycemic.
J.D.: Oh, that's funny because the only person that could've given him insulin... [v.o.] Uh-oh. [talking] Me! I gave him insulin. [v.o.] Twice.
Carla: He's fine, Bambi. I gave him an amp of D50 and he's eating now. But you should probably give him a glass of orange juice in an hour.
J.D.: Carla, thank you so much. You totally saved my ass.
Carla: No, it wasn't me.
Quote from J.D.
J.D.: Look, Turk.
Turk: Come on, man. You know, I always got your back.
J.D.: I know.
J.D.: [v.o.] Tell him how you feel without sounding like a girl for once.
J.D.: I miss you so much it hurts sometimes.
Turk: OK, um, you've had a rough day, so I'm gonna let that go for now.
J.D.: Thank you.
Quote from J.D.
Elliot: You don't even wanna hear about the day I've had.
J.D.: You're right. Kiss me.
Elliot: Right now?
J.D.: We can wait, like, three, four seconds.
Elliot: But I just ate, I feel gross.
J.D.: Not gross, pretty. Come here. [timer beeps]
Elliot: J.D., can we just talk for a second?
J.D.: [v.o.] It never fails.
Quote from J.D.
[fantasy: J.D. arrives in "The Friend Zone":]
Man #1: Oh, yeah, another one.
Man #2: How're you doing?
Man #3: Went to high school with her.
Man #4: We worked at Penguins Yoghurt.
Man #5: I met her on a bus.
Becky: She'll come around.
Man #3: Pretzel?
J.D.: Thank you.
Quote from J.D.
J.D.: [v.o.] I know choosing friendship over sex is the last thing any guy wants to hear, but you know what? This time, it actually made sense to me. Besides, I challenge anyone to survive being an intern without having a close group of friends to lean on.
Quote from Turk
J.D.: I can't believe you lost our bottle opener.
Turk: Yeah, I know. I miss it so much it hurts sometimes.
J.D.: You're a bad person.
Turk: Don't judge me.