Andy: Super cool to hear Sister Christian that many times in a row. Now is the moment we've all been waiting for. This next band agreed to reunite for one night only, and it's gonna be great. I personally hope that they play Summer Sun. [cheers and applause] We all know how it goes, right? [sings] Summer sun Summer sun
Scott Tanner: Hey, Andy. Why don't you let us play those, bud?
Andy: Oh, yeah, good point. Okay. Without any further ado, land ho!

Tom: Why would you come here, Saperstein?
Dr. Saperstein: I came here to see your flourishing business, to see how well you're doing. Wow! You're back. Can you squeeze me in, or do I need a reservation? [chuckles] 'Cause there's nobody here.
Tom: Maybe this restaurant won't be a huge success. Maybe it won't be packed with celebrities.
Joan Callamezzo: Tommy!
Tom: Or maybe it will. Hello, Joan. Hello, Perd. Thanks for coming by.

Diane Lewis: You know, I don't think that the girls have ever been happier or more surprised than when you got up on that stage.
Ron Swanson: Well, having you and the kids in my life has made me a different person. And I like it. There's more room in my life for... fun. [chuckles]

Andy: Babe, thank you so much for organizing the mouse rat reunion.
April: It was actually Ginuwine who arranged everything. He really cares about you.
Andy: You're the greatest wife ever. I wish I could marry you all over again. [gasps] Let's get divorced. That way, we can get married again.
April: Yes, let's do it.
Andy: You want to?
April: Yes!
Andy: We should do that, right?
April: Yeah, totally.
Andy: [gasps] We're getting divorced!

Dr. Saperstein: Thomas. Yes, we don't get along, but I look at you... I see driven, I see smart, and I just had the best Italian meal I've ever had in my life, and I've been to Dallas. I'm in.
Tom: No way. I'm not gonna let you take another one of my businesses.
Dr. Saperstein: No, no, I'm in as a partner. I'm always looking for new investments. I've got an auto dealership. I've got a massage parlor, a dry-cleaning transactional holding company that is doing unbelievably well, I might add. What do you say?
Tom: You know what? I'm not really looking for investors, given the almost embarrassing level of success I've attained, but I'll consider it. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to get some pictures for my wall of fame. Uh, excuse me, miss Hanley? Do you mind if I snap a you-ie? It's what I call selfies of other people.

Grant Larsen: Hi, Leslie and everyone. I'm Grant...
Leslie Knope: No time for small talk. I think the best version of me working as Midwest regional director is not in Chicago. It's right here in Pawnee.
Grant Larsen: How so?
Ben: The financial savings here are enormous. I mean, the cost of living is way lower here, and renting the entire third floor of this building would be way cheaper than a much smaller space in Chicago.
Tom: Pawnee is actually closer to most of the parks in the Midwest region, and it's got Tom's Bistro... an exciting new-wave Italian eatery that's equal parts Dean Martin and Bruno Mars. But that's just what The Indianapolis Star is saying. Let's see what everyone else has to say.
Donna: No, no, this is not what we're doing right now. But congrats.
April: Leslie should stay here. And if you don't agree with us, it's nine against one, and we can make you disappear forever.
Grant Larsen: What?
April: I said, "We have free Wi-Fi."
Leslie Knope: Look, Pawnee is a town on the rise, and National Parks could get in on the ground floor. It's the best option, hands down.
Grant Larsen: Well, I'll run this up the flagpole.

Tom: Opening of Tom's Bistro was a disaster. So, what? This is America. And America's the land of second chances. And now we have one night, one after-party, to make the world realize that Tom's Bistro is where miracles can happen!
Craig: Thomas, I have to work all day at the Unity Concert. If you're gonna pull this off, we need more people!
Tom: I know, and I didn't wanna do this, but I called in some reinforcements.
Jean-Ralphio: Did someone call for a party zoo?
Mona-Lisa: [meowing]
Tom: Take these VIP invitations, find all the A-list peeps at the concert, and get them to the restaurant tonight.
Jean-Ralphio: I like your energy, hombre. What do you say you and I ride go-karts later?
Craig: I wanna go horseback riding!
Jean-Ralphio: Deal.