Ray: Guys, I'm really glad you could come.
Hank: Well, Amy had a long talk with me, and she's asked me to make an effort with your family.
Peter: And I'm going to make an effort because I'm a Christian.

Peter: Ray! Hey, happenin' party.
Ray: What the hell is wrong with you?
Peter: What?
Ray: Why would you say that to him?
Peter: I don't know what you're talking about. Dad? I think I'm getting one of my dizzy spells.
Do you think we could leave now?
Hank: But we just got here.
Peter: You know, Ray, I'd love to stay here and talk with you, but I am really getting lightheaded here. Is someone wearing a citrus-based cologne? Come on, Dad-
Ray: No, I want to talk to you.
Peter: Hey! Hey! Don't go all mafia on me here, okay?

Peter: Guys, look, this is really hard for me. Um, I've had some issues with this whole marriage agenda, but I've had some time to reflect, and I realize that I may have been a wiener.
Robert: That's okay, Peter.
Peter: No, it's not okay. We're gonna be family, and I just I want to be able to call you guys, both of you, brother-man.
Ray: All right. Okay.
Peter: Welcome to our lives.
Robert: Okay. It's all right. Thank you. Thank you, Peter.
Peter: Well, thank you. And now, I shall take my leave. Have a great day. [exits]

Pat: Oh my, we're supposed to get started in five minutes, and I haven't seen Reverend Stevens yet. Peter.
Peter: Yes, Mama?
Pat: Honey, you picked up Reverend Stevens this morning, didn't you?
Peter: Well, yes, of course, I did, Mama. I have no idea where that rascal could've gotten to, but I'm on it.

Pat: [o.s.] Are you in there, Peter?
Peter: Yes, Mama, I am. Come on in.
Pat: Oh, hello. Peter, we found Reverend Stevens. You can stop looking.
Peter: Oh, thank goodness.
Pat: Everything all right in here?
Peter: Yes, everything's fine, Mama. Everything's great. Hey, I think it's weddin' time, isn't it? Places, everyone. Oh, good luck out there.

Peter: Well, good morning there, brother man!
Robert: Hey.
Peter: Why don't you come on over and have a seat? You know, I figured since I made raspberry waffles yesterday that we should probably go low carb, Officer Belly. Oh, so did you sleep all right?
Robert: Not especially.
Peter: I was out like a puppy in a pickup truck. I gotta tell you, that sofa is more comfortable than my own bed.
Robert: Mother of God!

Peter: You know, Amy was wrong about you. You're not nice, you're not sensitive, and I'll tell you something else, you're not a gracious host.
Robert: Get out of my underwear!
Peter: All right. You want it, you have it.
Ray: Hey, hey!
Amy: No no!
Ray: Hey! Everybody, stay in the underwear that brung ya!

Robert: Hey.
Peter: [sipping milk from a saucer] This is 2%. Miss Puss will never go for this.

Peter: Debbie, Raymond, I appreciate the generous offer, but I won't be staying with you tonight.
Robert: Yep. He's coming home with us.
Amy: [excited] Really?
Ray: [more excited] Really?
Robert: And tomorrow after breakfast, I'm taking him by my old building.
Peter: Yeah, Robert says his old apartment is still available, and, apparently, there's quite an active social scene there, so...
Amy: Robert! That's a wonderful idea!
Peter: I can't wait to tell Miss Puss!

Pat: Peter was very inspired by that Catholic ceremony.
Ally: Come on, Peter. When are we gonna have the Easter-egg hunt?
Peter: Oh. Patience, little ones, patience. Now run along and play in the garden.
Ray: Hey we've still gotta finish that puzzle, right?
Pat: Oh, yeah. I'd like that.
Peter: Mama, I'll help you hide the Easter eggs in the garden. I'm an "eggspert."