Adult Chris: [v.o.] My father couldn't leave Drew and Tonya home alone, because if you pull that Home Alone crap in a Black neighborhood, they take away your kids.

Mrs. Booker: Can I help you?
Julius: I was looking for Mr. Omar.
Mr. Omar: Oh, hey, Julius. Yeah, this is my friend Mrs. Booker.
Julius: I'm sorry about your husband.
Mr. Omar: Yeah, caught a deadly case of botulism. Tragic, tragic.
Mrs. Booker: How did you know-
Mr. Omar: Baby, why don't you go and put that record on for me?

Adult Chris: [v.o.] The snow stopped the traffic, but it couldn't stop Risky.
Risky: Julius! Julius!
Julius: Risky?
Risky: What are you doing out here, man?
Julius: Chris is stuck at school. I gotta get him. Can you help me out?
Risky: Oh, sorry, no room, man. Me and my man, Nanook, out here trying to make money on these cross-country skis. You want a pair?
Julius: How much?

Chris: Do I have to go to school? I mean, it's snowing like crazy.
Rochelle: It's snow, Chris, not Armageddon. Now hurry up. You know the buses are going to be running slow. Go.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Because my mother wanted us to get the best education possible, as long as school was open, we had to go no matter what.
[flashback to Tonya in bed:]
Rochelle: Ooh, baby, your temperature is 103.
Tonya: Can I stay home from school?
Rochelle: No. Just put this ice pack under your hat. You'll be all right.
[flashback to Drew vomiting in the toilet:]
Rochelle: Ooh, baby, I think you got food poisoning.
Drew: Can I stay home from school?
Rochelle: No. Drink this ipecac. You'll be all right.

Gunman: Come on, the bag! Put it in the bag! Get to the back! Come on!
Adult Chris: [v.o.] My mother had lost her money, but there was only so much she could take.
Rochelle: Good day to rob a train, huh?
Gunman: Watch your mouth!
Rochelle: Why?! You done already took my money! What else you gonna take, my seat?
Gunman: I might shoot you!
Rochelle: And you might go to jail! You got six bullets and nine passengers, which leaves three witnesses, and 25 years to life!
Luther: Don't shoot her, shoot me.
Gunman: Don't tell me who to shoot!
Rochelle: What are you, trying to get shot?!
Gunman: Shut up! [the woman screams again] Will you be quiet?!
Rochelle: Sit down.

Adult Chris: [v.o.] Back at home, Drew and Tonya were monopolizing all of Mr. Omar's time.
Drew: Boardwalk with a hotel. Looks like somebody owes me $2,000.
Mr. Omar: Dang. Tragic.
Tonya: Mr. Omar, how come every time we see you with a woman, their husband just died?
Mr. Omar: Well, that's because I'm a funeral director, baby.
Tonya: But when the wives die, how come you don't make friends with the husbands?
Mr. Omar: Oh, well, men don't need as much attention.
Drew: Man, if my wife died, I'd be crying, sitting at home by myself wondering what I'm gonna do, how to go on. I'd be wishing anybody would talk to me.
Mr. Omar: Well, women are sensitive, you know, in a different kind of way.
Tonya: Oh, I thought that women were like that because they were desperate.
Mr. Omar: Roll the dice, baby.

Chris: You know I didn't mean to break it.
Principal Edwards: It's okay. It's just a vase. A vase that changed my life.
Chris: Sometimes I wish I could change my life. Go places like you. Get away from the school. The neighborhood. Caruso.
Principal Edwards: Doesn't work like that. As long as you're you, they'll always be a Caruso.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I thought about living in Japan.
[fantasy:]
Joey Caruso: Arigato, Slappy.
[fantasy:]
Adult Chris: [v.o.] In London.
Joey Caruso: Cheerio, Nipsy.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Morocco.
Joey Caruso: Asalamalakem, Flip.

Adult Chris: [v.o.] Meanwhile, there were more kids at my house than there were at my school.
Chris: Hello? Is anyone here?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I wouldn't put it past all the other kids to hide from me.

Adult Chris: [v.o.] While I was getting snowed in, back at home, the word was out.
Weatherman: [on TV] To repeat, city buses are experiencing delays of up to four hours due to closings and hazardous conditions. Now here's a list of the latest school closures. Corleone Junior High...
Tonya: Daddy, look, Chris' school is closed.
Julius: What?
Drew: See, it says Corleone Junior High School.
Julius: If his school is closed, how come he hasn't called?
Drew: Maybe he got trapped in a snowdrift and had to eat his own mouth to survive.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] That's a thought.

Adult Chris: [v.o.] I was the only one in school, but Principal Edwards handled things by the book. He took attendance.
Principal Edwards: Caroline? Chris?
Chris: Here.
Principal Edwards: Chris. Eddie?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] We said the Pledge of Allegiance.
Both: One nation, under God, indivisible with liberty and justice for all.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Since I was the only one in class, he let me say the Black Pledge of Allegiance.
Both: One nation under a groove getting down just for the funk of it. One nation and we're on the move. Nothing can stop us now.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] After lunch, we sang "Aqua Boogie."