Lindsay: You know what? Tobias and I will break into her house and get the specimen. We've been looking for a little excitement.
Tobias: Yeah! It'll be fun. We will be like Tracy and Hepburn. [as Katharine Hepburn] "What do you say, you old poop?"
Lindsay: Oh, God, he's Hepburn.

Lucille: She'll sell the company or break it up into little parts or something all under the guise of "caring" about our family.
Michael: Gotta stop quoting when you drink. I certainly hope she's not planning a move.
Lucille: I wouldn't put it past her. She'd love to get at me any way she could. That's why she's been flirting with Gob. She's trying to prove that she's closer to my children than I am, but the joke's on her, because she doesn't know how little I care for Gob.
Michael: Think that makes the joke on Gob.

Narrator: In fact, the skipper had already rented his boat to be shot in Maeby's film. So neither he nor Gob were prepared for the challenges of using cats to catch a seal.
Gob: God! It's like herding cats.

George Sr.: [on the phone] Hold on. A client is coming, and I don't know where Oscar is, he's disappeared. And there is something up with him because he is scary now. He has changed.
Barry: Hey, you've changed, you big [bleep]. You're acting like a little girl lately, and not in a good way. Pull yourself together. Act like a man.
George Sr.: You're right, you're right. Okay, love you.
Barry: Love you, too. Bye.

Narrator: But as her trial grew closer, it was getting harder for Lucille not to alienate her alibi.
Lucille: This toast has hook holes. Again! I told you to get rid of that thing. It's hideous. Plus, what's gonna happen when they swear you in? You're gonna rip the Bible in half. The jury'll love that.
Buster: You're getting pretty snippy to your key witness, aren't you?
Lucille: What do you want?
Buster: Maybe you could hook me up with a little stimmy. Lil' stimmy.
Lucille: Are you trying to do this?
Buster: Yes! And I want stimmy to get a hook that'll do that.

Narrator: But alone with Buster, the tension grew worse, and things came to a head the night before the trial.
Lucille: Buster, I'm going to exhale!
Buster: No, please! I've had, like, seven in the past half hour.
Lucille: You're not the one staring five years in the face.
Buster: Well, right now, I'm staring at 100 years in the face!
Lucille: How dare you. [to the guard] Would you mind?
Buster: Be careful, defendant. Remember who you're talking to. It sure would be a shame if something happened to your pretty little key witness.
Lucille: Star witness. And are you threatening yourself?
Buster: Maybe I am.

Maeby: Can you believe this? They're still fighting.
George Michael: Yeah, I know. I'm tempted to kiss again so we could teach 'em a lesson.
Maeby: Why would that teach them a lesson?
George Michael: No, I mean, uh, to freak them out.
Maeby: That doesn't make any sense.
George Michael: Isn't that what makes it funny? [laughs] I'm laughing. Go fish... Uno... Okay. I just need a drink. [drinks]