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‘Public Relations’ Quotes Page 1 of 4    

Arrested Development: Public Relations

111. Public Relations

Aired January 25, 2004

Michael hires a publicist to improve the Bluth family image as he seeks to get George Michael admitted to a private school.

Quote from Lucille

Lucille: I'll have the Ike and Tina Tuna.
Waitress: Plate or platter?
Lucille: I don't understand the question, and I won't respond to it.

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Quote from Lucille

Lupe: Good-bye, Missus. [Lucille searches Lupe's handbag]
Michael: Well, Lindsay, you'll be happy to know that I have a new idea. I met a publicist today. I'm gonna hire her. We need somebody to make us look good.
Lucille: And I say it's a waste of money. We're plenty sympathetic as we are. [to Lupe] Is this your onion?
Lupe: Yes.
Lucille: What's in the foil?
Lupe: Nothing. It's a ball of foil for my son.
Lucille: Have a great day, sweetie.
Michael: I don't know how she can't.

Quote from George Sr.

George Sr.: [on TV] I didn't quite hear that. The reception is bad. But as the Talmud tells us... [static] to the jackal as to an oxen. [laughs] Did it get a laugh?

Quote from Tobias

Narrator: Each with their new charge the Bluths set about redefining their image. Tobias was off to Los Angeles International Airport determined to return to his family with a career.
Tobias: Well, this is great. Why would anybody take a limo? What is this, like, $12?
[later, with two young passengers in the van:]
Tobias: Why would anybody pay more than $12 to go to the airport? Next stop, LAX.
[later, with another group also in the van:]
Tobias: Come on! We're stopping again? How many more stops are we gonna make? Honestly, I haven't even seen this part of Los Ang- Is that snow?

Quote from Tobias

Tobias: Really, now. This is ridiculous. I paid 12 American- Oh, my God. You are Carl Weathers, the actor. I went to San Francisco to attend your stage fighting workshop. But you never showed up.
Carl Weathers: I got bumped from that flight. Hell, they'll give you $300 if you get bumped. It's this crazy loophole in the system that the wrong guy discovered. Guess where I won't be going. [chuckles]
Tobias: Yeah. So... I am an actor too.
Carl Weathers: Oh. Good.
Tobias: Well, I want to be. Without the proper training, I'm afraid I'm doomed to be a doctor.
Carl Weathers: Well, hell, I can train you.
Tobias: Oh, well, I'm afraid all I have is $1,100 and that's for this plane ticket, so...
Carl Weathers: Check this out. $1,100 is exactly what I charge for acting classes.
Tobias: No, it isn't!
Carl Weathers: Yeah.
Tobias: Well, what are the chance... [chuckles] Universe, you've done it again.

Quote from Narrator

Narrator: Michael Bluth was taking his son to an interview at the prestigious Milford School, an institution once famous for its credo that children should be "neither seen nor heard."

Quote from Lindsay

Waitress: And what would you like?
Lindsay: I'd like my old life back.

Quote from Lindsay

Michael: Nonetheless, this bad press is starting to taint my son's future and we've got to put an end to it.
Lindsay: Michael, if this is a lecture on how we're all supposed to whatever and blah, blah, blah... Well, you can save it 'cause we all know it by heart.

Quote from Lucille

Lucille: Get away from my son!
Michael: Hey, Mom. Kind of on a date here.
Lucille: You'll change your mind after this.
Narrator: And Michael saw the story that Jessie had planted.
Lucille: Let me tell you something, sweetie. We may pick on each other, get into little scrapes, call each other names and occasionally steal from each other... but that's because we're a family. You have no right. You don't get to do that.

Quote from Lucille

Narrator: With her blood sugar at a perilous low, Lucille made Lindsay pull into the nearest restaurant.
Waitress: Welcome to Klimpy's! Anywhere you like!
Lucille: This does not bode well.

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