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‘Hand to God’ Quotes Page 1 of 3    

Arrested Development: Hand to God

212. Hand to God

Aired March 6, 2005

Buster adjusts to life without his left hand after an incident in the ocean. Michael tries to learn the truth about Maggie Lizer (Julia Louis-Dreyfus).

Quote from Maeby

Narrator: In fact, she was overseeing a remake of The Old Man And The Sea for the film studio where she'd bluffed her way into a job.
Maeby: What on earth is taking so long? Am I the only one who wants to get home and see their kids?

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Quote from Lucille

Narrator: And back at the penthouse, Lucille was praying for the second time in her life.
Lucille: Lord, let Buster forget everything. And if you need to take another hand to make that happen, please make it Gob's.

Quote from Lucille

Lucille: How's my son?
Doctor: He's going to be all right.
Oscar: Oh, thank God.
Lindsay: Finally some good news from this guy.
George Michael: No other way to take that.
Doctor: That's a great attitude. I gotta tell you, if I was given this news, I don't know that I'd take it this well.
Lucille: But you said he was all right.
Doctor: Yes. He's lost his left hand, so he's going to be "all right."
Lucille: You son of a bitch! I hate this doctor!
Michael: He's a very literal man.
Doctor: Yes, that's more the way I would take the news.

Quote from Gob

Narrator: In fact, the skipper had already rented his boat to be shot in Maeby's film. So neither he nor Gob were prepared for the challenges of using cats to catch a seal.
Gob: God! It's like herding cats.

Quote from Michael

Narrator: And later, Lucille could not contain her guilt any longer.
Lucille: I did this. I prayed that God take anything he wanted from us so that Buster wouldn't have to go to war.
Michael: Oh, Mom. After all these years, God's not gonna take a call from you.

Quote from George Michael

Narrator: Michael was looking for his son with whom he had a secret to share.
Michael: There you are. Hey, pal. You alone?
George Michael: Almost always, yeah. You know, Maeby's never around anymore and Ann's off with her religious group, trying to get Nip/Tuck taken off the air.
Michael: They don't like Nip/Tuck?
George Michael: Well, you know, they don't like anything. Something about God wants people to age naturally... I don't know. Ironically, she likes Gangie.

Quote from Lucille

Narrator: In fact, Michael's family had just gotten a little smaller.
Michael: [answers phone] Hello?
Lucille: [screams down the line]
Michael: Mom, you've got to stop starting conversations like that.
Lucille: Something happened to Buster. He lost part of his body. I don't know which one.
Oscar: The hand.
Lucille: I told him to stay out of the ocean, but we had a fight. Who remembers about what?
Narrator: I do. Buster had discovered that his Uncle Oscar was his true father. As an act of defiance to Lucille, he first went swimming in the ocean, where he was attacked by a loose seal.

Quote from Lucille

Lucille: Oh, that George. God only knows where he is.
Oscar: [screams] The car!
George Sr.: Up yours, granny!
Lucille: [screams] You couldn't handle it!

Quote from Lucille

Narrator: Soon, Michael and George Michael arrived at the hospital.
Lucille: If something happens to Buster, I'll be lost.
Michael: Yeah. Excuse me.
Lucille: George Michael, you're going to have to be the baby of the family.
George Michael: Um, Maeby's younger than me.
Lucille: You're never going in the ocean! Never!

Quote from Buster

Buster: Actually, I'm relieved. I don't have to go to army because the seal with the bow tie attacked me. I feel like I've lost three pounds.
Michael: Seal with the bow tie?
Buster: Yeah. I think that's what I saw bite me. Now I just wish I could remember why I went in the ocean. Did we fight or something?
Lucille: Of course not. Although I always have warned you against the ocean. So has your father.
Buster: My father?
Lucille: George Sr. You need more juice. Where's the juice? Give my son the juice!

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