Donna: Ew!
Jackie: Donna, don't you knock?
Donna: Not when it's my room.
Hyde: Well, we're in here, so-
Donna: Yeah, well, I'm in here, so-
Hyde: Hey, if you want to watch, I can get into that. Have a seat on the horse.

Hyde: Hey, how was your weekend, Roy?
Roy: Aw, pretty good. Think I might have met a woman.
Hyde: Aw, that's great, man.
Roy: She's staying at the hotel. When I took butter to her table, she looked right at me and said "Took you long enough." Huh?

Eric: Oh, uh, excuse me.
Fenton: Yes, may I help you? Oh. Hello, Fez.
Fez: Fenton.
Eric: You two know each other?
Fez: I don't want to talk about it.
Fenton: Well, there's nothing to say.
Fez: You can say that again.
Fenton: Don't tell me what to do.
Fez: Oh, you'd like that, wouldn't you?
Fenton: Maybe I would!
Fez: Then there's nothing to say! [both turn away from each other]
Eric: Yeah. Um, I have a question about this letter. See, I don't think I'm gonna be able to make a ring payment anytime soon, so I was wondering if we could work out some kind of deal.
Fenton: Fine. Here's a deal. You're going to have to come up with the money by Friday or bring the ring back to the store.
Eric: What? Bring the ring back? No, I can't do that.
Fenton: You can and you will. No later than 5:00. I have a party at 8:00. I need the time to dress.
Fez: Eric, you're going to want to do what he says. I've been at the other end of Fenton's stick, and believe me, that's not a place you want to be.

Kelso: Okay, so you're absolutely positive that my hairnet has to be pink?
Hyde: It's gotta match your apron. You're pretty.

Fenton: Hello, Mr. Forman. And you.
Fez: Shut your filthy mouth!
Eric: Look, here it is. Here's the ring back.
Fenton: Oh, honey, that's paid for.
Eric: What?
Fenton: Someone came in and paid through the end of next month. I'm not supposed to say who, but she sure was a pretty little number. I guess.
Eric: You know what? It was Donna. I can't believe she'd go behind my back like this.

Fez: I cannot believe that this man would go behind my back and take what was given to me by God himself.
Eric: All right. What happened between you two anyway?
Fez: I'm too much of a man to say. But it involved a half-off sale, a crowded parking lot, and a pair of pants that make my ass look like an oil painting.
Fenton: If you mean, "old and cracked," then I agree!
Fez: I'll see you in hell!
Fenton: Well, I'll be wearing your pants!
Eric: Okay, I'm feeling a little "in the way" here so... I'm ju... I'm- [walks away]

Kelso: Oh, Roy. Hey, how's it going with that hotel chick that was all over you, asking for butter?
Roy: Well, I had this idea to surprise her with flowers? But when I did, she started screaming and hitting me. And I guess the lesson is, don't hide in someone's shower.
Kelso: I don't know what's wrong with chicks, man. If I came home and some strange girl was in my shower, that would be the greatest day of my life.
Roy: Yeah. So, what are you doing?
Kelso: Oh, Hyde's making me do his laundry. Then after this, I gotta clean out the toilets and hand-test all the mousetraps. This probation period is killing me.
Roy: Did Hyde tell you there was a probation period? Aw, man! That guy really knows how to enjoy life.
Kelso: Wait. You mean, Hyde's just messing with me? I don't have to worry about getting fired?
Roy: If I didn't get fired for hiding in some woman's shower, I think your job's secure.

Donna: Jackie! Jackie!
Jackie: [wakes up] Hmm?
Donna: I heard something underneath my bed.
Jackie: Fez?
Fez: [o.s.] [imitates cat] Meow!
Donna: Fez, the cat's outside.
Fez: [o.s.] [imitates dog] Woof, woof?
[Jackie and Donna drag Fez out from under the bed]
Fez: Please, let me stay. I promise I won't make a sound. Well, I do make some sounds, but they're happy sounds!