Garrett: There's 1,000 bucks in it. I already opened it.
Marcus: Oh, my God.
Amy: What? For Jonah? Were you guys even close?
Glenn: She never mentioned that when I made her tea every morning, or when I took her to her doctor's appointments.
Jonah: I mean, I was nice to her, but, you know, like a regular amount of nice.
Sayid: And she fell right into your trap.
Jonah: There was no trap.

Marcus: It's the way of the world. The rich get richer.
Jonah: Who's rich?
Justine: How many cruises did you go on as a kid?
Jonah: That's... not the point. Sure, I grew up comfortable, but now I have tons student loan and credit card debts. Look, guys, I have no idea why she gave me the money, and I'm just saying I'm not the spoiled wealthy guy you all see me as.
Garrett: I mean, you did start working in retail on a whim.
Jonah: Can you back me up here, please?
Amy: Why? You're doing great.

Sandra: Hey, Dina. Are you... mad at something far way?
Dina: Just thinking about Myrtle. I always meant to tell her how much I admired her work ethic. I mean, she didn't know what she was doing, but, man, could she randomly move things around.
Sandra: Yeah. I miss her, too. We used to go to the same water aerobics class at the gym.
Dina: I don't want to picture your hair wet.
Sandra: We wear swim caps.
Dina: Sandra, please.

Dina: It's just, when someone dies, it... brings up a whole lot of regrets, you know? Makes you think about all the things you wish you could've done differently. It's really been making me think about my dad.
Sandra: Aww. Yeah, maybe you should reconnect before it's too late.
Dina: Oh, God, no. I want him to feel this kind of regret. I wanna cause him the pain that he caused me.
Sandra: I started smiling before I heard what you said.

Cheyenne: This lipstick is stay all day, all organic, and only $13. Cash only. Just put the money on the counter, and then I'll shake your hand with the lipstick in my palm.
Woman: Um, I really just popped in for chunk salmon and water.
Cheyenne: Okay.

Jonah: I can't be the guy that keeps this money, right? I don't even know why I have it.
Amy: 'Cause you're the sweet prince.
Jonah: [sighs] I'm just gonna give it back to the family. Then they'll have the money and everyone here will know that I'm just like a regular man of the people.
Amy: The people would never turn down $1,000. Everybody here would keep that money. Some would try to steal more of it.
Jonah: Okay, well, then what if I gave it to you? I mean, I'm living in your house. It's the least I can do.
Amy: Yeah, you know, I haven't wanted to say anything, but you do owe me, like, 19 grand, but I'd prefer you pay me back in sex.
Jonah: Mm, that's a lot of sex. Okay, well, how about we just share it, then? We could spend it on something nice, like a trip.
Amy: Ooh, I have always wanted to go to Florida.
Jonah: Like the Florida from the news?
Amy: Well, if you ignore all the people, it's basically Hawaii.

Dina: So I was able to get my dad's phone number from his Facebook. Luckily, old people still trust the internet.
Sandra: Cool. And I'm here for support.
Dina: No. You're gonna call him. Look, my dad... scum of the earth, human equivalent of a Band‐Aid in a salad... left me 23 years ago. He deserves to suffer. So you're gonna call him and tell him you're my friend Sandra Johnson from work.
Sandra: Sandra Johnson?
Dina: Kaluiokalani sounds made‐up. Anyway, just tell him I'm dead.
Sandra: What?

Howard: [answers phone] Hello?
Sandra: Uh, this is Sandra Johnson. I work with your daughter Dina at Cloud 9, and I just wanted to tell you that Dina... passed away.
Howard: What?
Sandra: Yeah, I'm sorry. She's dead.
Howard: Oh, God. [cries]
Sandra: Actually, she's not dead.
Howard: What?
Sandra: Nope. She's dying.
Dina: [whispers] Dead. Fully dead.
Sandra: The doctor said she stabilized and she might pull through. [Dina kicks the chairs] But I think they were just trying to be nice. They seemed like liars.
Howard: I'm sorry, what are you...
Dina: [hangs up] Damn it, Sandra. If you can't even convince my dad I'm dead, what the hell can you do?

Howard: Yeah, we talked earlier on the phone. I'm Dina's dad, Howard. I... I called the number back and they gave me the store address. The app said it was a 47‐minute drive. I made it in 40 flat.
Sandra: Congrats.
Howard: Our conversation left me with more than a few questions. I mean, she's dead? She's dying...
Sandra: Sir, the truth is, Dina's fine. She wanted me to fake her death to make you feel bad.
Howard: Well, I guess, uh, can't say I don't deserve it. I'm no golden jackal when it comes to parenting. They're incredible fathers. Is Dina in the store?
Sandra: Yes, but small heads‐up. She's very angry. If she goes for a choke hold, it's best to just pretend you've passed out, okay?
Dina: Dad? [runs over and hugs Howard]
Sandra: Now that everything's out in the open, my name isn't actually Sandra Johnson. It's Sandra Kaluiokalani.
Howard: Yeah, sure it is.

Jonah: "Florida man cuts nose off with samurai sword."
Amy: We're going to the other coast.