Lieutenant Disher: How's she doing?
Natalie: There are two dead women named Julie Teeger and all she cares about is her driver's test.
Lieutenant Disher: Well, maybe it's healthy. I mean, he's living her life.
Natalie: Yeah, meanwhile I'm a wreck.

Natalie: Vanilla fudge, my favorite.
Lieutenant Disher: Yeah, I know. I got it from your freezer.
Natalie: Randy, I need to ask you a favor.
Lieutenant Disher: The answer is yes.
Natalie: I need a gun.
Lieutenant Disher: The answer is no.
Natalie: I know how to use it. When we lived on the base, Mitch took me to the firing range all the time.
Lieutenant Disher: So apply for a permit.
Natalie: No, I cannot wait two weeks. I need something now. I need something in my hand. I just feel so helpless sitting here waiting.
Lieutenant Disher: Well, she's gonna be okay. I mean, I'm right here, so... [drips ice cream over tie] Nothing's gonna happen. [licks tie]

Captain Stottlemeyer: She asleep?
Natalie: No, not yet.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Good, let's pack her up. There's a room at the police station.with a couple of beds. There's a TV and you'll have your own bathroom.
Natalie: Why, what happened?
Captain Stottlemeyer: Nothing, I''m just- I'm being careful, that's all.
Natalie: Captain, if something happened, you have to tell me. I'm her mother.
Captain Stottlemeyer: All right. I thought it was a fairly common name. I thought there'd be a hundred others. We checked Nevada, Oregon. Went as far east as Colorado.
Natalie: And?
Captain Stottlemeyer: And she's the only Julie Teeger within a thousand miles.
Julie Teeger: You mean the only one left.

Lieutenant Disher: [over radio] He's never gonna buy this.
Adrian Monk: Dr. Kroger thinks he will. Matthew Teeger has suffered a pure psychotic break. He's in complete denial. His mother never died. Not to him.
Captain Stottlemeyer: The important thing is that we keep him talking.
Lieutenant Disher: What if he has a knife?
Captain Stottlemeyer: He's right. We need a code, a phrase, in case he's in trouble.
Lieutenant Disher: How about, "Mother of God, he has a knife!"?

Captain Stottlemeyer: No, it needs to be covert. It needs to be conversational. Sound natural.
Adrian Monk: How about, "I wish there were ten of them"?
Captain Stottlemeyer: Ten of what?
Adrian Monk: Anything.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Well, you see, Monk, I don't think anybody else would actually say that.
Lieutenant Disher: [over radio] I've heard people say that.

Captain Stottlemeyer: Okay, look, here's the code. Better late than never.
Lieutenant Disher: Yep, got it.
Captain Stottlemeyer: You want to write it down?
Lieutenant Disher: No, no, I'm good.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Okay, what is it?
Lieutenant Disher: It's-
Captain Stottlemeyer: Better late than never.
Lieutenant Disher: Yeah, I got it, no problem.

Matthew Teeger: Hi, mama. I'm sorry I'm late. I came by earlier, there were policemen everywhere.
Lieutenant Disher: Yes, they were looking for you, Matthew.
Matthew Teeger: Must have burnt out again. I'll get another one.
Lieutenant Disher: No, no, no, no, no. Leave it, leave it. The light hurts my eyes.
Matthew Teeger: Are you okay, mama?
Lieutenant Disher: I've been crying. Crying about you, Matthew. The police said that you've been a bad boy. Have you been doing something you shouldn't?
Matthew Teeger: I don't wanna talk about it.
Lieutenant Disher: They said that you've hurt some.
Matthew Teeger: I said I don't wanna talk about it!

Natalie: Harriet Teeger, Holda Teeger?
Julie Teeger: I like Holda. It's Scandinavian. It means lovable.
Natalie: Wait, you want to change your name?
Julie Teeger: Wouldn't you?
Natalie: Well, honey, I want you to be safe. That's what's most important. But I don't want this creep to change who we are or how we live.
Julie Teeger: It's just a name.
Natalie: You know, naming you Julie was your dad's idea.
Julie Teeger: I know. Aunt Julie.
Natalie: Yeah, but she wasn't just his favorite aunt. She was an amazing person. She was one of the first female war correspondents. She was in Vietnam. She was fearless. Plus, she practically raised your dad. I think it's a beautiful name. It suits you. Come on, let's keep it.
Julie Teeger: Okay.
Natalie: Okay. Besides, Holda Teeger?

Julie Teeger: You said they caught him, I could take my driver's test.
Natalie: No, I said maybe.
Julie Teeger: Mom.
Natalie: Okay, let's just leave it up to Mr. Monk. If he says it's okay, you can go.
Adrian Monk: No, no, don't drag me into this. As you may recall, I have enough problems of my own.
Natalie: Well, now you have another one.

Julie Teeger: Mr. Monk. Mr. Monk, please. I'm begging you. Mr. Monk, I am begging you.
Adrian Monk: Julie, look, he's just a suspect. Listen to me, we haven't even questioned him yet.
Julie Teeger: Mr. Monk, he's the guy. When you came in, you said it was all over.
Adrian Monk: Well, it sounded good. I wanted to make a big entrance. Look, let me think about it, okay?
Julie Teeger: Mr. Monk, he's in jail. He can't do anything now.
Adrian Monk: Yeah, you know, I'm busy. I got a lot of things to do. I got all these yellow pencils.
Julie Teeger: Everybody's driving. All of my friends. You were a kid once, weren't you?
Adrian Monk: Very briefly.
Julie Teeger: Then you remember what it's like. I'm just trying to fit in, Mr. Monk. I just wanna be normal.
Adrian Monk: Why don't you talk to the captain?
Captain Stottlemeyer: Oh, no, not my jurisdiction.
Julie Teeger: Mr. Monk, the DMV is four blocks away on Vinton Street. And if I leave now, I still might make it.
Please, Mr. Monk, look into your heart. I am begging you.