Emily: Are you all right?
Susan: Oh, he's fine, he's fine. It's just us getting along is difficult for him because he doesn't like me.
Ross: Oh, come on. That's ... that's true.

Chandler: Wow, it is true what they say: Pregnant bellies look like a drum.
Phoebe: Ha ha. No, it's that- I'm so pregnant that my guitar doesn't fit anymore. So I thought until I'm not, I'm going to play all my songs on this drum. It sounds really cool. Listen, listen.
[playing the drum] Smelly cat, smelly cat, What are they feeding you?
That sounds great. I know. And I've only been playing for, like, an hour.

Emily: I've left a bra drying on the shower rod. You don't think your son will think it's yours and be horribly traumatized?
Ross: Hey, if Mommy can have a wife, Daddy can have a bra.

Emily: It's time to go.
Ross: See, that clock's a little fast. We still have 17 minutes. What can we do in 17 minutes ... twice?

Ross: You can ignore that.
Emily: That's Carol with your son.
Ross: Believe me, when he's older, he'll understand.

Rachel: Hey, Mon, if you were hoping to sleep with Joshua for the first time tonight, which one of these would you want to be wearing?
Monica: You know, it really creeps me out choosing other people's sex clothes.

Ross: So Emily called last night.
Chandler: And now you're giving me the message?

Chandler: There are no famous Joeys. Except for Joey Buttafucco.
Joey: Yeah, that guy really hurt us.

Rachel: What?
Joshua: Nothing. It's just that I know that they're still out there.
Rachel: They're across the hall. I mean, that's two doors away. It's going to take them a long time to peck their way back over here.
Joshua: That's not funny.

Rachel: You should know this place is a real babe magnet. Want to make out?