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‘The One with All the Haste’ Quotes

Friends: The One with All the Haste

419. The One with All the Haste

Aired April 9, 1998

Monica and Rachel try to win their apartment back from Chandler and Joey. Meanwhile, Ross is upset when Emily is set to head back to London.

Quote from Phoebe

Chandler: Ho, ho, ho.
Phoebe: Excuse me?
Chandler: Your pants.
Phoebe: Oh yeah. You like them? I went to a used-clothes store and got a bunch of maternity stuff. These are so comfortable.
Joey: Pheebs, those are Santa pants.
Phoebe: What?
Chandler: Santa pants. Santa Claus's pants.
Phoebe: Nuh-uh. No. They're maternity pants. Look, they even came with a list of baby names. See? These names are good, and these are bad. Oh.

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Quote from Chandler

Chandler: Forget it. I'm not giving up my bachelor pad for basketball seats.
Rachel: Your "bachelor pad"?
Monica: Have you even had a girl up here?
Chandler: No. But Joey has, and I usually talk to them in the morning time.
Joey: Yeah you do.

Quote from Chandler

Ross: Hey guys.
Chandler: Oh, my God.
Joey: What, we don't make enough fun of you already?
Ross: Oh, yeah. Emily convinced me to do it.
Chandler: You do know that Wham broke up?

Quote from Chandler

Ross: I can ask her to live with me.
Chandler: Are you serious?
Ross: Why not? I mean, why not?
Chandler: Because you've only known her six weeks. Okay, I've got a carton of milk in my fridge I've had a longer relationship with.

Quote from Chandler

Ross: Look, guys, when I'm with her, it's like ... she brings out this great side of me. I mean, I love her, you know?
Chandler: And I love the milk. But I'm not going to ask some British girl to move in with me. Joey, you say things now.

Quote from Chandler

Ross: Thanks guys.
Chandler: No problem. Just remember to wake us up before you go-go.

Quote from Joey

Chandler: Look, I want those basketball seats just as much as you. Okay, but we can't live in the small apartment after we've lived here. Didn't you ever read Flowers for Algernon?
Joey: Yes. Didn't you ever read Sports Illustrated? No, I didn't read yours.

Quote from Phoebe

Phoebe: What are you going to bet?
Rachel: Well, I think we should let Phoebe decide because she's the only one who's impartial, and she's so pretty.
Phoebe: Okay. I have a game. This is great!
Joey: What's the game?
Phoebe: Well, it doesn't have a name. No, okay. Phoebe Ball. No, it doesn't have a name. Okay. Monica, what is your favorite thing about trees?
Monica: They're green?
Phoebe: Good. Five points.
Monica: All right.
Phoebe: Joey, same question.
Joey: They're tall.
Phoebe: Ooh, three points. Both fine answers, but we were looking for leafy. Leafy.

Quote from Rachel

Monica: That's not even a game.
Rachel: Shut up. We're winning!

Quote from Ross

Emily: I don't know. Leaving London. My whole family lives there. My job.
Ross: You'll get a job here. I mean, I'm always hearing about them foreigners coming in and stealing American jobs. That could be you.

Quote from Chandler

Chandler: This is our apartment and they stole - You stole! -our apartment.

Quote from Monica

Monica: Men are such idiots.
Rachel: I know. Can you believe something that stupid actually got us our apartment back?
Phoebe: It's so funny to think, if you had just done that after the last contest no one would have had to move at all.
Monica: Let's pretend that's not true.
Rachel: Yeah.


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