Daphne: Roz told me all about it. It's no big deal. Accidents happen even when you're being careful. I had one myself a few years back.
Frasier: Oh, Daphne, really?
Daphne: Yeah. It was one of those real wham-bam numbers. He was drunk and I wasn't paying attention. I called and called, but never got a penny out of him.
Frasier: I had no idea.
Daphne: Oh, it's not so bad. For goodness' sake, back in Manchester, what with all those drunken louts out and about, it must have happened to me at least a dozen times.
Frasier: Really? I had no- Really?

Frasier: Daphne, I know you're in hell right now, but in just about twenty minutes comes the disconnecting of the ventilator and the extubation. You can see it all in the diagram on page 24-C...
Daphne: He's not a diagram! He's my husband and he's on a table with his chest cut open! I'm sorry if I can't handle this as well as the rest of you, but I'm terrified!
Roz: Daphne, it's okay. Just calm down. You know when this is all over we're...
Daphne: There is no "when this is over"! There's no tomorrow, no next week, no next year! There's nothing until he comes out of there and I know he's okay!

Martin: Now, listen. On the off chance that the guard asks you a question, can you say anything in an American accent?
Daphne: [in an American accent] Sure.
Martin: Okay, what?
Daphne: You just heard it!
Martin: What?
Daphne: [in an American accent] "Sure." That's it. That's all I can say.

Niles: Lilith, what a pleasant surprise. Well, how was Bora Bora? I've never seen you looking quite so tan.
Daphne: My God, what does she look like in winter?

Frasier: No, I'm serious, Daphne. I plan to go running just after I finish my obituary. [chuckles] You see, it's a self-actualizing exercise. You write your obituary the way you'd like it to appear - years from now, of course - and then it helps you to focus your goals. You see, here they are, all my hopes and dreams.
Daphne: These are dreams, all right. [laughs] "Dr. Crane came late to athletics, he became a fixture in the Seattle marathon, the America's Cup yacht race, as well as the Kentucky Derby." [laughs] A jockey at your size! You better start writing an obituary for the horse.

Frasier: So, Carla, how've you been?
Carla: Well, two of my kids are in jail, the bank's about to foreclose on my house and, after tonight, I'm never gonna see Cliff Clavin again. Things are great!
Frasier: Yeah, Carla was never really a fan of Cliff's.
Carla: Yeah, not to talk the guy down, but he's a big blowhard who thinks he knows everything and never shuts up.
Daphne: Imagine.

Frasier: Guess who? Daphne, um, I don't want you entertaining here but I also don't want you to move out.
Daphne: Oh, I see. So you want me to stay, but just not have a personal life?
Frasier: Well...
Daphne: No, no, no. That works out fine for me. I'll just spend all day waiting on you and your father, then in the evenings retire to me room, wrap meself in an Afghan and wait for the morning. And if my whimpering gets too loud for you, you can just have me fixed like Eddie.

Daphne: Where's my jar of Bovril?
Niles: No, I wasn't. ... Oh, the meat paste. Well, I threw it out, it smelled rancid.
Daphne: Well, that's how it's supposed to smell. It's English.

Niles: Well, fine, then. If you won't tell me, I'll just ask Daphne myself.
Frasier: Niles, wait. The truth is, Daphne's...
Martin: ...mother is dying.
Niles: Oh, dear God.
Frasier: Yes. Tragic, isn't it? You know, she's going to need all the support that we can give her.
[Daphne enters with tears in her eyes]
Daphne: Evening, Dr. Crane.
Frasier: Well, come on, Niles, we don't want to lose our table.
Daphne: [to Niles] Did you hear the news?
Niles: I just did. What can I say?
Daphne: Oh, I've thought about this day, ever since I was a little girl.
Niles: I'm sure you have.
Daphne: It's even better than I thought it would be. I can already picture the big day: beautiful flowers everywhere, a sea of smiling faces, and I suppose everyone will want to have their picture taken with the lady of the hour.

Frasier: Gosh, it's so obvious, isn't it? You know, when a person is confronted with some deeply troubling issue that they're not ready to face yet, they usually avoid the problem by obsessing about something else, something completely trivial.
Daphne: [entering the apartment] Got it!
Martin: Got what?
Daphne: Dr. Crane's oat bran.
Martin: God, you left for that eight hours ago.
Daphne: Well, it wasn't easy. They were out of it at the regular market, so I went to another one but then they were out of it. So, I looked into it and it turns out they don't sell it in Washington anymore. Well, for some reason I just couldn't let it go, so I went for a little drive. [to Martin] You know, it wouldn't kill you to do something like that once in a while, get off that big round duff of yours. Anyway, a hop, skip and a jump later, here it is, fresh from Portland. Well, I'm off to bed. Good night.