Topanga: As you look back on your first year at John Adams, what would you consider you greatest accomplishment and why?
Cory: Let's see. I mean, there's so many.
Shawn: It's hard to pick just one.
Cory: There was the time we-
Shawn: No, no, that wasn't us.
Cory: Well, what about the time we-
Shawn: Also not us.
Topanga: You guys are the two most pathetic students in this school.
Shawn: That's an accomplishment.

Cory: Wow, you shave?
Shawn: See, facial hair sprouts early in my family. Especially on my mom's side.

Shawn: Get this, I also turned all the clocks ahead twelve hours! *bell rings* Yeah sure.

Dana's mom: We have something to tell you. Sit.
Dana: Oh, no.
Shawn: We're sisters!
Mr. Turner: Hold it. Nobody's nobody's sister.

Cory: Richard and Cindy?
Shawn: Very deeply in love.
Cory: Since when?
Shawn: Lunch.
Cory: What did they eat?
Shawn: I don't know but it doesn't look like it was enough.

Shawn: Hey, Sergio. Hands-off-io.

Mr. Feeny: Mr. Hunter, clipping coupons?
Shawn: Yep. Odor-Eaters. $2.49 for a dozen. And my Christmas shopping is done.

Professor: I like the way your mind works. Free will. Want to take a shot?
Shawn: Do I really have a choice?
Professor: Ooh! I got to take five.