Shawn: I think he just found Slippy, his lucky soap.

Cory: Wow, you shave?
Shawn: See, facial hair sprouts early in my family. Especially on my mom's side.

Cory: Come on, Shawn. You lived here three weeks and you've been in the bathroom two and a half of them.

Mr. Feeny: So, Mr. Matthews, SATs this Saturday?
Eric: Yeah, me too.

Shawn: If I want to clip my toenails at the dinner table, I don't appreciate the dirty looks.
Cory: We were just covering our food.

Mr. Turner: Now see, why can't you be this sharp in my class?
Shawn: Math's not my best subject.
Mr. Turner: I'm your English teacher.
Shawn: Then why are you teaching math?
Mr. Turner: Are you kidding me?

Eric: All right, Mr. Feeny. I have been planting, and hedging, and mowing for three days now. The SATs are tomorrow and I demand to know the secrets.
Mr. Feeny: Get a good night's sleep.
Eric: What? No, no, no. No way. Not until you tell me what the secrets are.
Mr. Feeny: I just told you one. Sleep.
Eric: I can't sleep. The test is tomorrow. I haven't thought about it in days.
Mr. Feeny: Which is secret number two. Clear your mind. Care to take a guess at what secret number three is?
Eric: You're Satan?

Mr. Feeny: Eric, do you know what SAT means?
Eric: Sat?