Adam: Oh, God! Am I losing her already?
Beverly: Yes, you are. [chuckles] Unless...
Adam: Unless what?
Beverly: Unless we drive down to Virginia so you can tell that girl how you feel.
Adam: A mother-son road trip?
Beverly: Mother-son road trip.
Pops: Oy, gevalt!
Beverly: I'm already packed. So are you. I'll meet you at the car.

Adam: How do I look?
Beverly: If I was a girl your age, I would fall into your arms and never let you go.
Adam: I wish I didn't find that comforting. Here goes nothing.
Beverly: I'll go ready the fog machine, balloons, and confetti.
Adult Adam: [v.o.] This was it. I had my tux, my flowers, and one shot to convince Brea not to move south forever. My mom and I had thought of everything. [Adam grunts as Murray tackles him] Except that.
Adam: Oh, balls!

Beverly: Murray? What are you doing in the Deep South?
Murray: Saving the boy from making the biggest mistake of his life.
Adam: You drove down to stop me?
Murray: Damn right. This is a huge mistake. Look at your mom with the balloons. I mean, how many balloons is that?
Beverly: The appropriate amount... Murray.
Murray: Let's go.

Murray: Look, your mom got in your head. She seems to think that if you go away for a little while, you go away forever.
Adam: Huh. That does sound like her.
Murray: If you decide to stay here with Brea, she'll have a breakdown. It's no coincidence she has two kids going to college just miles away from home.
Adam: Oh, my God! How did I not see it? This has been about you the whole time!
Beverly: That is outrageous! But maybe.
Adam: I almost ruined my relationship because of your crazy insecurity.
Beverly: Is it so wrong that I want to keep my babies close to me?
Adam: If it stops them from living their lives, it sure is. I don't even want to be near you right now.

Adult Adam: [v.o.] The day had arrived. Geoff and Erica were seeing Nancy Glass live, and it was even better than they could've imagined.
Nancy Glass: So you're saying the ghost not only liked your pets but it knew your dog's name?
Geoff: [to Erica] I can't believe we're actually here.
Nancy Glass: Now let's open it up to the audience. Any questions?
Barry: I've got a couple.
Geoff: Barry?
Barry: Your guests had a hard time when the ghost who was haunting them moved on to another house?
Nancy Glass: They did feel alone and forgotten.
Barry: Might a man feel similarly dismissed if his best friend started dating his sister and then treated him like hot garbage?
Nancy Glass: I imagine that would be very hard.
Geoff: Follow-up! [audience murmurs] Isn't it possible that "this guy" that that gentleman is referring to is actually just a giant selfish baby? [audience murmurs] Also, how did you get in here?
Barry: Think you're the only person who knows the son of a blind guy who almost died of mold? [chuckles]

Nancy Glass: Do you two know each other?
Barry: That's my supposed best friend, who's dating my sister. [audience murmurs
Geoff: And that's the no-longer-my-best-friend who's pretending to date my sister.
Joanne Schwartz: Fake or not, you should support us.
Erica: Hey. I'm the girlfriend of the brother's best friend, and I'm starting to think that my boyfriend, who I adore, asked the wrong person to the show. [audience murmurs]
Geoff: Wait. What?
Nancy Glass: I want to focus on this, because you're all clearly hurting right now. [to guests] And also, ghosts aren't real. I'm sorry. They're just not. Names?
Geoff: Uh, Geoff.
Erica: Erica.
Barry: Barry.
Joanne Schwartz: Desdemona Von Jorgerson.

Nancy Glass: Erica, why do you think Geoff asked the wrong person here today?
Erica: They watch your show together all the time. It's, like, their favorite thing.
Geoff: I love you, Erica, and I just wanted to share this experience with you.
Audience: Aw!
Barry: That love used to be for me.
Nancy Glass: Barry, let me take a stab at this. Do you suppress your feelings and then let them all out at once like an emotional volcano? [Barry sighs]
Erica: Holy crap, she's good.
Nancy Glass: What do you want to say to Geoff right now? Be honest, but be calm.
Barry: There's no one in the world I'd rather have date my sister.
Audience: Aw!
Barry: But you're still my best friend, and sometimes I want my special time with you.

Nancy Glass: Geoff?
Geoff: I guess our situation is a little more complicated than I realized. And I could be better about making sure we have time to hang out.
Nancy Glass: Barry, what do you want to do right now? Be sincere.
Barry: Hug.
Nancy Glass: Geoff?
Geoff: Let our bodies become one.
Nancy Glass: Let's do it, boys. [they hug]

Adult Adam: [v.o.] Just like that, Nancy Glass fixed Barry and Geoff. As unlikely as that was, there was another unexpected mediator that day. My dad.
Adam: Let's go.
Murray: Not with me. You're going with your mom.
Adam: No way.
Murray: Look, your mom is an anxious person. She's an all-time worrier, but nine times out of ten, that worrying keeps you kids safe and happy.
Adam: I know.
Murray: Your mom is terrified about you going to New York. But it's how you want to chase your dreams, so she's behind you 100%.
Adam: She is, isn't she?
Murray: Come on. Give her another chance. Get goin'.

Beverly: I am so sorry, Schmoo. I promise, from here on out, I will never Interfere with your happiness again. No matter how far away it may take you.
Adam: You will. But... It's okay.
Adult Adam: [v.o.] It's easy to want the people we love to stay close by. Mostly 'cause, deep down, we're afraid they won't come back. But the truth is that time apart could make you realize what needs to change. And that change can open up a world of possibilities.