Matt: I got it. Come work with me at The Gap. I get 25% off all cargo shorts. These are the same ones Queen Latifah wears.

Geoff: Hang on. T- That's a good idea. W- Why are pizza places the only ones that deliver? What if there was a business that would deliver any food to your house?
Barry: Like live Maine lobsters?
Matt: Beef Wellington with a port wine reduction!
Naked Rob: Or pizza from fancy pizza places that don't deliver.
Geoff: All of it. You call me, I place the order, pick it up, bring it to you, all for a small fee.
Murray: I can get an outside-the-house sandwich while staying inside the house? Sandwich me.
Geoff: I have my first customer. W- Wait. I think I just started a business.

Adult Adam: [v.o.] While Geoff was finding his calling, I was finding myself totally lost in history class.
Mr. Woodburn: Here are your assignments for your papers. Dave Kim... Harriet Tubman.
Dave Kim: Sweet! H-Tub. Nothing's gonna be underground about her when I'm done with my paper.
Mr. Woodburn: I weep for our future.

Adam: There's my special lady.
Beverly: Wait, what?
Adam: I was thinking about us being study buddies. Let's do that.
Beverly: Are you toying with my heart right now? Because it will literally explode!
Adam: No toying. Just a boy looking to do some scholastic bonding with his mama. Where should we start? Oh, I know! I have to write a paper on one Sandra Day O'Connor.
Beverly: And you immediately thought of me?
Adam: Well, you were almost a cookbook author, and you almost coulda been a lawyer.
Beverly: I was almost both of those things.
Adam: So, let's get on it, girl! We'll make a whole Sandra Day of it.
Beverly: Yay! My sweet little baby has re-latched to my bosom.
Adam: You have a way with words. So let's start writing that paper without those ones specifically.
Beverly: I'll bring the typewriter, you bring the dimples, study buddy.

Beverly: Hey, Schmooey, you're just my type. [both chuckle] Typewriter humor.
Adam: Just save that gold for the page.

Beverly: So, where do we start?
Adam: Here's everything I know so far... She's a lady.
Beverly: Well, I know a ton. [chuckles] For her confirmation hearing, she wore the most hideous purple coat.
Adam: You're an expert. Let me get out of your way.
Beverly: [sighs] I wish this essay was a million words. Should we do that? Just write a million words?
Adam: Definitely. But no.

Barry: Big news, Geoffrey. I'm using company funds to buy an expensive putter for my putting green. This one keeps missing the hole.
Geoff: Barry, do you really need all that stuff?
Barry: You need to spend money to make money. Sometimes I question your commitment to my business.
Geoff: It's my business!

Barry: Geoff! Geoff! Geoff? [to a woman] Sorry. You have the same fat head as Geoff. Ladies and gentlemen, I'm looking for a man named Geoff!
Erica: Barry, be quiet!
Barry: There you are!
Geoff: Why are you here?
Erica: And why are you wearing a suit?
Barry: In no particular order... I'm a high-powered CEO, and the worst has happened. Customer Murray Goldberg got the wrong order. He's freaking out and wants you to fix it.
Geoff: Oh, no.
Barry: Oh, yes! I even considered handling it myself, but I came here 'cause it was easier.
Erica: Well, tough luck. We're on a date, so let the other JTP dopes do it.
Geoff: I'm sorry, Erica. I have to fix this.
Barry: [chuckles] People think he's alive, but he's dead.

Mr. Woodburn: Not to mention, Mrs. Goldberg, it is riddled with historical inaccuracies.
Beverly: Well, I'm sorry I didn't have time to go to the library and wrestle a vagrant for the microfiche.
Mr. Woodburn: Why would you go to the library?
Beverly: Because I am helping Adam... A little. Full disclosure, we're study buddies.
Adam: It's mostly just snacks and moral support.
Mr. Woodburn: It's clear what's happening here, so I am gonna change this grade.
Beverly: Finally. An A-minus and we're out of here.
Mr. Woodburn: It's an F for cheating.
Beverly: Well, I give you an F for "failure as an educator," and I am taking this to Principal Ball. Don't worry, Adam. Mama's got this.
Adult Adam: [v.o.] But she didn't.

Murray: I ordered a cheesesteak. What's this green thing with the red things in it?
Geoff: You mean a salad?
Murray: How am I supposed to know?
Geoff: I'm so sorry. I-I'll fix it.
Erica: Don't put up with his nonsense.
Geoff: He's a platinum member.
Murray: Not for long, unless I get a new cheesesteak.
Geoff: But Lee's is closed.
Murray: Well, you better find out who took mine, Barnaby Jones.
Geoff: I mean, I guess there's only a few houses it could have gone to.
Murray: You're driving.
Erica: Wait, you're going, too?
Murray: I want to see for myself what kind of person takes another man's sandwich.