Adam: Dad, it's totally unfair if you say no. I mean, you drive Barry to his wrestling matches and hockey games.
Murray: Well, that's completely different.
Adam: How?
Murray: I like those things. You see the distinction?

Naked Rob: They're a fiercely loyal group or friends. They're just like us, ya know?
Andy: I love you, JTP.
All: [emotionally] JTP.
Geoff: Oh, man, I feel like I want to hug you guys.

Barry: That's pass interference. Essie Karp's big dumb head got in the way. Sweet. Various cheeses.

Dave Kim: Last night's rehearsal was amazing. I love how loose we all get as the night wears on.
Evelyn Silver: Yeah, that's when David Cassidy says the magic happens.
Adam: Okay, stop the madness! None of you actually know David Cassidy.
Evelyn Silver: Adam! David is a colleague.
Dave Kim: I can't have this negativity. I have to perform tonight, and if I'm not 100%, that's just not fair to the audience.

Adam: Mommy made me mash my M&Ms. Mommy made me mash my M&Ms. Mommy made me mash my M&Ms.

Barry: You were cutting it close there. We were about to head over to Mrs. Naked's house.
Beverly: Say "hi" to the Nakeds for me.

Beverly: Well, my friends made me realize you've been playing me
Barry: Well, you know what I think? Those "friends" of yours are a bad influence.
Beverly: Please. You don't even know 'em.
Barry: Believe me, I've lived a long time. I know a bad apple when I see one.
Beverly: Pfft. I can be friends with whoever I want.
Barry: Don't you walk away from me, Young Lady Mom!

Adam: Dad, I have amazing news.
Murray: You say that a lot, but it never pans out.
Adam: Oh. Then I guess I can't interest you in these hockey sport tickets.
Murray: Wait. You got us Flyers tickets?
Adam: It does say that on the envelope, so yes.

Adam: Listen, I'm always pushing you to understand my stuff, so, for once, I thought it'd be cool for you- Whoa!
Murray: Thank you. This means everything.
Adam: Oh, boy.
Murray: All my life, the only way I knew how to connect with other people was through sports.
Adam: A hug. That's unexpected.
Murray: And when I realized you had no interest-
Adam: This is a really long hug.
Murray: I just didn't know how to get close. But now I can!
Adam: The important thing is, I bought us tickets to something. Doesn't matter what.
Murray: You know, once you discover the magic of hockey, then you'll see what I see, and you'll become a true puck head.
Adam: Kind of like how seeing a musical could turn you into a theater geek?
Murray: [laughs] You know, normally, I don't get your jokes, but it's already working! Oh-oh-oh, man.
I am so looking forward to this hockey game.
Adam: Me too!
Murray: [kisses Adam on the cheek]
Adam: This is a really long hug.

Barry: It's now or never, boys. We're not just at war for our turf, we're at war for our honor.
Matt: Again, there is no war, just a minor disagreement with your mother.