Virginia Kremp: Yoo-hoo! [glass clinks] Why don't we go around the table and everyone say one thing that you're thankful for.
Pops: Can someone send some turkey to the foyer?
Beverly: I'm thankful my daughter hasn't changed at all since going to college. She's still the same as she's always been.
Virginia Kremp: Aww! Shady and selfish.
Pops: Shellfish?! We're having shellfish?! What kind of Thanksgiving is this?

Murray: Barry finally made a good decision to be a doctor. I'm not going to let you ruin it with one of your bonehead rackets.
Marvin: My "rackets" are not boneheaded.
Murray: Oh, yeah? How about formal pajamas? Baby college? Powdered yogurt? Dogs for dogs? Foot mittens? Spoons made out of meat? Airplanes that just drive?!
Marvin: Ground planes was a good idea.
Murray: That's called a bus!

Erica: I should be the one freaking out, Geoff. I'm so screwed.
Geoff: Well, on the bright side, at least you didn't sink all your money into some investment scam like Barry.
Erica: Investment scam. What investment scam?
Geoff: Oh, no! Please don't join your uncle's illicit "boiler room".
Erica: They have a boiler room? Where?
Geoff: In your basement, next to the actual boiler.

Beverly: Well, this year, Turkey Day is all about taking it easy.
Erica: So, you're not going to cook for days without sleep and then break down crying because your ungrateful children won't help?
Beverly: That me is dead and gone. This year, I've invited 50 people over for pot luck.
Geoff: I heard Coach is bringing his famous protein-packed string beans.
Pops: I have to eat the coach's food? I'm very depressed now.

Adam: Wow! Oh, sweet glorious balls! It's the commercial for the new "E.T." game. I love you, Atari! You are a god!
Pops: Are girls still a thing for boys in high school?
Adam: Remember this moment, Pops. After today, our lives change forever.
Pops: Different things excite us.

Marvin: That's right. Cadillac. The "Cadillac of Cars".
Barry: Whoa.
Marvin: I'm a real stock broker now inspired by the loveable character that Michael Douglas plays in the movie "Wall Street". Check out my shoulder pads. Feel that power.
Barry: Wow.
Marvin: Do you like that?
Barry: So soft, but so commanding.
Marvin: I can set you up with my shoulder pad guy.
Barry: My shoulders have always been my problem area.

Erica: Take a break, Geoff. I really have to talk to you.
Geoff: Oh, come on! I've only been here for two minutes! Thanks for ruining my life, Erica!
Erica: Okay, what's happening right now?
Geoff: We both know what's happening. You're dumping me. I knew it.
Erica: What? Why would you think that?
Geoff: It's Thanksgiving break. It's when people come home from college and break up with their high school sweetheart. It's a rite of passage. They call it the "turkey drop".

Marvin: Welcome to Wall Street, gentlemen. I'm sure that Barry has filled you in on the basics of our little business endeavor.
Andy: He told us we could triple our money in three days.
Marvin: Can't make any promises. But what I can do is promise that it will happen for sure. No question!
Barry: I like those odds.

Beverly: Did you know there's a wonderful parade on Thanksgiving? Seriously, why have I been torturing myself every year at Thanksgiving when it is so much easier to let Virginia Kremp do everything?
Virginia Kremp: Bevy, do you have another pan? I think we're crowding the carrots.
Beverly: You got this, Ginzy.
Virginia Kremp: I really don't!

Barry: This is insane. How could you just turn your back on me?
Naked Rob: I guess 'cause we're millionaires now and you're not.
Andy: Yeah, we just don't have that much in common anymore, you know.
Barry: But this literally just happened.