Red: Well, this is the worst thing that you have ever done! Eric, I am gonna make you... I am going to... Well, I can't think of anything worse than sending you to Africa. You're going to Africa.

Donna: Surprise.
Eric: It's just you? Donna, this is the best surprise ever. So, the Vista Cruiser, huh? You know, this is where we had our first kiss.
Donna: I know. I remember. [Donna kisses Eric]
Eric: Wow.
Donna: Well, it's gotta last a really long time.
Eric: This is weird. I mean, me leaving. It's like it's real.
Donna: Yeah, but you're gonna be back before you know it, and then we're gonna have our whole lives to spend together.
Eric: Listen to me, Donna, I love you so much. You know, you're my best friend. And I... I love you. And thank you for not letting my mom plan this, like, going-away surprise thing.
Donna: I love you, too, Eric. And I'm sorry.
Eric: For what?
Donna: For this. Okay, guys!
All: Surprise!

Kelso: All right, here's your motel. You're gonna love Chicago. You never lived near the ocean, but that's all about to change thanks to good old Lake Michigan.
Jackie: Yeah, I just wish I knew someone here. A friendly face, you know?
Kelso: Don't worry. You're gonna be great. [hugs Jackie] [Jackie stays still] [yawns] Oh, boy, I got a long drive back. [Jackie remains still] You know, that door's kind of tricky. You gotta actually open it. [Kelso opens the door] All right, Jackie, do you want me to stay and get a burger with you or something?
Jackie: Michael, it's like you're a mind reader. Okay. Wait. No, keep going. Guess what I want on my burger.
Kelso: Lettuce, tomato and ketchup put on by a waiter born in America.

Eric: You guys, I leave for Africa in two days. How come no one told me about these shots?
Kitty: Oh, goodness gracious, did I forget to give you that letter? [laughs] You know, when you get to be my age, sometimes you forget about things. And sometimes you hide them in the rarely used Mexican soup section of this gigantic cookbook.
Eric: Mom, I need these shots. Africa is very strict about these things, and they're not strict about anything. I mean, the women walk around with their hoo-hoos hanging out.
Red: Kitty, you have no right to stand in the way of someone's dreams. And if you don't let Eric go to Africa, you'll crush my dream of getting rid of him.
Kitty: Fine. Eric, I'll give you the shots. A mother should support her son. Just know the needles are big as sausages, and if I miss the mark by even a hair, your heart might explode. But don't worry. It only hurts till you die.

Eric: Hey, Donna, look, there's something really important I need you to do for me.
Donna: Eric, I don't care if you're going to Africa. I'm not doing that.
Eric: Please don't let my mom plan this fancy send-off for me, okay? I can just see her planning this embarrassing farewell with, like, music and banners and, like, doves.

Kelso: Oh, man, it's good to be home. Jackie was all depressed and crying 'cause she didn't have any friends in Chicago. So I had to lighten the mood with some skee ball.
Donna: Um... Jackie hates skee ball.
Kelso: I didn't take Jackie.
Donna: Well, that explains why she's called me four times since she's been in Chicago. Three of those were to say that she hates my outfit. How does she know?

Eric: [answers phone] Hello?
Jackie: Hey, Eric? It's Jackie.
Eric: Uh-huh.
Jackie: Look, I just realized you're about to leave for Africa, and I won't get a chance to say goodbye in person. That makes me sad. I mean, you've always been very special to me.
Eric: Okay, Jackie, if there's a gun to your head, say the word "cream cheese."
Jackie: No, Eric, I'm just gonna miss you is all, okay? So just take care of yourself in Africa.
Eric: Okay. I will. Wait, you want to talk to who? You want to tell him you love him? Well, I don't know. You guys didn't really leave on the best of terms. Okay. Dad, telephone!

Charlie: I don't know Eric very well, but he seems like a heck of a nice guy.
Fez: Eric? Eric is good people. Is good people, yes. I'll never forget. It was the hottest day of summer, and Hyde and Kelso dug a hole then covered it with leaves. And they said, "Hey, Fez, wanna see a pile of dead leaves?" So, naturally, I ran over.
Charlie: What happened?
Fez: I fell in and I couldn't get out. And the sun was beating down. So hot. So hot. Finally, Eric came over. And you know what that magnificent boy did? He poured soda all over me because that's what friends do. And then the ants came.
Eric: Hey, guys.
Fez: [clears throat] Oh, Eric, about you leaving, I just want you to know that... Oh, here comes the waterworks.

Leo: Hey, Hyde, man.
Hyde: Hey, man.
Leo: Listen, I wanted some tunes, so I need to find a record store.
Hyde: Leo, you're in a record store.
Leo: Whoa, that was fast, man. So what are you doing here?
Hyde: I'm the boss, man, which is ironic, 'cause I'm also the least-motivated employee.

Leo: So if you have a whole record store, how come you've been kind of mopey lately, man?
Hyde: I'm not mopey. I'm fine.
Leo: Well, where's that loud girl you're always hanging with?
Hyde: Jackie? She's in Chicago.
Leo: Loud girl's in Chicago. Hey, that's why you're sad, man. You love loud girl.
Hyde: Maybe I do. You know what? The only reason I'm admitting that is because you have no short-term memory and you're gonna forget this conversation when it's over.
Leo: Hey, that's not true, man. Hey, guess what I found out?
Hyde: What, Leo?
Leo: Loud girl's in Chicago.