Donna: Eric, are you ready to go? I wanna get to the feminist rally in time for the Hugh Hefner pinata.
Eric: Ooh! Uh, Mr. Barnett, this is Donna. Donna, this is...
William Barnett: I'm Steven's father. I'm Black, and it's okay.
Donna: Wow!
Eric: Whoa! Donna, please, do not flip out on the man just because of the color of his skin.
Donna: I would never do that. I would never do that.
Eric: Okay, Donna, let's just go, and maybe in the car we can have a little talk about how hurtful our preconceived notions can be. [raises fist] Power.

Jackie: Steven, this is so exciting.
Hyde: I know, I met my dad.
Jackie: And he's rich. Now, instead of waiting for you to get off your butt and make some money, we can just inherit it.
William Barnett: Wait a minute, you mean inherit it from me?
Kitty: No, no, no, no. All she means is that you are doing quite well. When I talked to your secretary and she put me on hold, there was music on the line. Ha! I thought to myself, "Well, this is a man who can afford a thing or two!"

William Barnett: I see, so you knew I had money before you invited me here?
Red: Is that supposed to mean something?
William Barnett: I don't know. Why don't you tell me, Steven?
Hyde: What are you talking about?
William Barnett: Well, I mean, we don't have to play games. I can give you money, if that's what you're after.
Hyde: That's who you think I am? I'll see you guys later.
Kitty: Steven...
Hyde: No, you know what? I didn't need anything from him growing up, and I don't need anything from him now. [exits]
Jackie: You know, that was very rude of you. And I can't believe I'm saying this to someone wearing cashmere, but, well, I don't think we can be friends.

Jackie: How could you say that to Steven? He doesn't want your money, I want your money.
Kitty: How could you think that anybody here needs your money? Look at this place. Glass grapes, pizza rolls, an organ. It's like Carnegie Hall.
William Barnett: I stand by what I said. What else was I supposed to think?
Red: You're supposed to look at me and know that I raised fine young men. Even though one of them is at a feminist rally.
Jackie: Mr. Barnett, you are wrong about Steven. He's perfect.
Red: I think you should go.
Kitty: I agree. I was gonna pack you some leftovers, but that ship has sailed, mister.
William Barnett: I hope this doesn't discourage you from inviting a second Black person into your home.

Eric: This feels really good, Donna. You know, I... Women should be able to walk through this park without being afraid. In fact, someday, I hope that I can walk through this park without being afraid. It helps to whistle.
Donna: Well, I'm really glad you came with me. And I loved seeing how passionate you got singing "I Am Woman".
Eric: Well, I'm having a lot of fun, Donna, and I'm sorry, but you look so hot. Your new blonde hair shining in the light of the burning effigy of that molester. [they kiss] Hey, I got an idea. Why don't we go "take back" the area behind that bench?
Donna: When do you want it?
Eric: Now!

Kelso: [answers phone] What?
Fez: Are you mad?
Kelso: No, Fez.
Fez: Look, you sound mad.
Kelso: Well, I'm fine.
Fez: You say the words, but I can tell you don't mean it.
Kelso: Look, just don't call me anymore! [hangs up] [answers phone]
Fez: Why do you keep hanging up on me if you're not mad?
Kelso: I'm waiting to hear from the mother of my child!
Fez: So you are mad. Curl up with the phone so we can talk this over.
Kelso: Fez, I'm hanging up.
Fez: Fine, just hang up, then.
Kelso: Fine.
Fez: Are you still there?
Kelso: Yeah, I'm still here.
Fez: Hey.
Kelso: Hey.
Fez: Thanks for not hanging up.

Donna: Run, Eric! Run like Bruce Jenner! Oh, crap, he doesn't know sports.

Fez: [o.s.] Open up, it's Dr. Baby Doctor. I have your baby and he wants to talk to you. [Kelso opens the door] It's just me. I'm not a doctor, and I don't have your baby. Burn!
Kelso: That was a good one. Listen, this baby stuff's, like, really important to me, okay? So I'm trying to take it seriously.
Fez: Hey, say no more. My sensitive friend, I am sorry. No more phone pranks from now on. Learn to trust your friends. [answers phone] Mr. Sexy's Pizza. Our special today is sex-a-roni.
Kelso: Fez! God! [takes phone] Hello? Brooke! What? Your water broke? What does that mean? Oh, God, that's disgusting. No, why would you tell me that? Oh, jeez! Okay, okay, I'm on my way. This is it! I'm having a baby!
Fez: Go get 'em, buddy! [answers phone] Mr. Sexy's Pizza. Our special today is sex-a-roni. Well, it's like pepperoni, but sexy. You mean, you want some? We're closed.

Hyde: Hey.
William Barnett: Hey. So I was wondering if maybe we could try this again.
Hyde: Yeah, I mean, it worked so well the first time.
William Barnett: I'm sorry about that. Thing is, if I grew up with nothing and found out I had a dad with money, I would have thought maybe he owed me something.
Hyde: Well, that's not me.
William Barnett: I know. But when we first met, I thought I saw myself in you.
Hyde: Yeah, I can see that. You and me, it's like looking in a mirror.
William Barnett: So you want to go get a beer or something? I can get you in some places you've probably never been to.
Hyde: Oh, like that cool jazz bar off the highway?
William Barnett: No, no, I'm talking about country clubs, fancy restaurants. I'm rich as hell, man.

[circle:]
Fez: So Kelso has a child. I cannot wait to see the smile on that sweet little face. And I'll bet the baby's cute, too.
Jackie: It is so cool that Steven's father is rich. You know, it almost makes up for my father being locked away in pris- I mean, native land.
Donna: Eric, I'm so sorry about what happened at the rally. It was like watching an antelope get taken down on Wild Kingdom.
Eric: This is permanent marker, Donna. I don't think this is coming off!