Glenn: Anyway, so where do we begin?
Justine: Someone diarrhea'd in the toy aisle.
Glenn: Oh, dibs! If if you don't mind.
Garrett: That's all you, dude.
Marcus: You got it.
Justine: Enjoy.
Glenn: Okay. Off to mop the slop.
Marcus: Ah, man, he made it sound fun.
Garrett: No, he didn't.
Marcus: Yeah, he did.

Jonah: Your dad is getting good.
Amy: Right? He's in this whole Brat Pack phase. 16-year-old Amy is very excited.

Woman: [on the phone] And I just want to confirm, are you gonna want an assistant?
Amy: Uh, oh, do I get an assistant? Glenn never had one.
Woman: Yeah, he always thought it would come out of his salary, but it doesn't.

Amy: [on the phone] Speaking of, um, I... I don't even really know what my salary is. Would you would you happen to have it?
Woman: Oh, it's, um, $109,000.
Amy: [stammering]
Woman: Hello? Are you still there?
Amy: Uh, yes. Uh... [stammers] Yeah. Uh, uh-huh. Sorry, sorry. Um... Did you, uh... You said $100,000?
Woman: And $9,000, plus a yearly bonus, usually around $10,000.
Amy: $10,000? Oh, excuse me. Sorry. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Sorry, sorry. Hello? Hello? Hi, hi, hi. You still there?
Woman: Yeah.
Amy: Um, okay, so... So when you say $10,000, you mean, like, on top of the previously mentioned $9,000, or is it, like, a part of the $9,000 so it's really just, like, $1,000?
Woman: I don't know what that means, but it's a total of $119,000.
Amy: And those are real, firm, rock-hard numbers? That's... I'm sorry if that sounded over-sexual. I'm just looking for confirmation.
Woman: Uh-huh. So I'll just fax over the contract, and you can sign it at your convenience.
Amy: Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, it's convenient right now. Uh, I could I could do that right now. Uh-huh.
Woman: Do you want to hear about your perks?
Amy: [mutes phone] Holy [bleep]! [unmutes phone] Yes, I would like to, um, hear about those, please.

Amy: Good morning, Sarah. Looking great! Good hustle, Brett! Hey, Sayid, you can go on a break.
Sayid: I already had my break.
Amy: Well, then it's a double-break day for you, my friend.
Cheyenne: You're in a good mood.
Justine: Somebody got laid.
Amy: No, actually, I, um... I'm just very happy. I like my new job. Oh, also, hey, everyone? There are doughnuts in the break room. [Justine gasps]
Cheyenne: Ooh, who forgot their doughnuts?
Amy: No, I bought them.
Cheyenne: Oh. Okay. Nobody eat the doughnuts. They're Amy's.
Amy: No, that's not- I- Doesn't matter. Good job, everyone. [walks off]
Cheyenne: She's so weird about her doughnuts.

Dina: Look, Jonah's a bimbo. You're management now. You don't see Dale Federman from the Clayton store walking around with some floozy on his arm. Okay? Keep him at the kids' table.
Amy: Yeah, no, those you make some really great points. I'll keep them in mind.
Dina: Well, just think about it. And if you need to have some rebound sex, I'm happy to call my guy. He's great. Croatian.

Jonah: You get an assistant and it's Myrtle?
Amy: Well, I just wanted to help the lady out. Besides, I am in a good mood.
Jonah: Ooh-hoo-hoo. What's going on?
Amy: I just found out my salary.
Jonah: [gasps] It's good?
Amy: I shouldn't say.
Jonah: You are dying to tell me.
Amy: Yes, of course I'm dying to tell you. Okay, I'm not gonna tell you my salary, but will you please hand me the contract that's sitting on my desk while I check out something on my wall and I trust you not to look? [chuckles]
Jonah: "Attention Cloud 9 customers, do you have a pet fish you love?"
Amy: No, that's this is the sale announcements.
Jonah: The sale announcements that Myrtle just took to Garrett?
Amy: Get her! Myrtle!

Mateo: Well, I just want to say, it's awesome to see another floor supervisor doing so well. I think I speak for all floor supervisors when I say you are an inspiration.
Amy: Oh, okay. Thank you.

Mateo: [over PA] Floor Supervisor Mateo Liwanag to Customer Service, please. Floor Supervisor Mateo Liwanag to customer service. [pants] Oh. That's me. Got to take it. [laughs] Whoo!

Dina: You know who you should date is that hot guy that you came in with last week.
Amy: Oh, maybe. Two problems: he's gay, and he's my brother.
Dina: Mm, I don't know. You guys had good chemistry.