Garrett: What's going on? What you guys talking about?
Jonah: Nothing.
Garrett: Nothing? So you guys are just in the hallway staring at each other saying nothing?
Jonah: Well, not nothing. I mean, we were... we were talking about...
Sandra: Jonah's going to a barbecue, and he asked if it'd be interesting to put burrata on a burger instead of provolone. And I said, "Who uses provolone?" [both laughs] And he was laughing, and then I started laughing. And then he asked, "Are burgers cliché in general?" And I said, "No, not if you use venison." But then you said, "Venison does not pair with burrata," so... here we are.

Glenn: I went to the movie Saw thinking it was about carpentry. It is not! I threw up in my lap. And then Jerusha made us stay because it was our date night and the tickets were non-refundable.

[Sandra plays Radiohead's "Creep" on ukulele]
Sandra: ♪ You're so freakin' special ♪ ♪ I wish I was special ♪ ♪ But I'm a creep ♪ ♪ I'm a weirdo ♪ ♪ What the hell am I doing here? ♪
Jonah: D-Did Brett like Radiohead?
Garrett: No, it's just the only song she knows.
Mateo: Her YouTube channel is so sad.
Sandra: ♪ I don't belong... ♪ ♪ Here ♪ [ukulele flourish]
Amy: Thank you, Sandra. That was... lovely.

Jonah: Hey, Myrtle, you've been here a long time, right?
Myrtle: Since 1987.
Jonah: Oh, yeah, so you were here, then, when Garrett first started...
Myrtle: The Cards were in the World Series. I was having an affair with Ozzie Smith. The Wizard, we used to call him.
Jonah: Wow, no kidding. So...
Myrtle: Turns out it wasn't really Ozzie. He was a waiter at Beffa's, which was a popular establishment back then.
Jonah: Beffa's? Never heard of it.
Myrtle: I once saw Al Wiman having a roast beef sandwich there. Well, he ordered it. I don't recall if he ate it.
Jonah: That's a really good story. Um, Myrtle, when...
Myrtle: Back then, people were tougher than they are now. You can't even call someone a [bleep]. Even if they're being one. [Jonah walks away] Which reminds me of a story... I once had a sister-in-law who really was [bleep], and she was adorable.

Mateo: I finally get to catch up on Kylie Jenner's Insta.
Cheyenne: Man, she does sponsored posts in a way that make you really believe that she loves the product.
Mateo: I know. It's beautiful.

Glenn: Well, you know, I'm still holding out hope that Brett's alive.
Cheyenne: Even with the foot?
Glenn: I don't wanna re-litigate the foot, but... I did wanna write a Brett tribute for the newsletter... you know, just in case. And you guys knew him so well I thought maybe you could help.
Mateo: Of course. I mean, we would love to honor him.
Glenn: So what was his wife's name?
Mateo: Um...
Cheyenne: Cinnamon.
Mateo: Margaret.
Glenn: Cinnamon Margaret?
Cheyenne: Mm-hmm.
Mateo: Yeah. Uh-huh. That is... what we said.

Glenn: "Swam up the Panama Canal." Hey, how long was he a cowboy trick rider for?
Cheyenne: Well, he was in the circuit for a number of years with his horse named... Cloud Tie.
Glenn: Cloud Tie.
Cheyenne: Yeah.
Mateo: And, uh, then he joined the Marines. He was in the... Blue Shirt Division.
Glenn: Okay.
Mateo: At the battle of, uh...
Cheyenne: Khaki Pants.
Mateo: Yep.
Glenn: Like it sounds?
Mateo: Mm-hmm. K-H... K...A-K-I.

Glenn: "If you're reading this, then your branch has been the victim of a workplace... tornado. Workplace tornados are a growing epidemic that we need to face while still respecting the right of every American to own tornados." It's good.

Glenn: "Many tornado victims describe worrying that behind every hallway, there's a lone tornado waiting to tornado them."

Jonah: You know, there's no shame in admitting you're having a tough time dealing with something, okay? In college, I discovered that my dad was having an affair on Parents Weekend. Try enjoying Stomp after that.
Mateo: Ugh, that's your trauma? I watched my brother drown in the South China Sea.
Jonah: Well, it's not a contest.
Mateo: Well, if it was, you'd lose.