Leslie Knope: I like capitalism. I love competition. I'm more competitive than you.
Ron Swanson: I don't think so.
Leslie Knope: I think so.
Ron Swanson: Settle down.
Leslie Knope: No, settle up. 'Cause the bill's been paid, and I've paid it, and I've won. Look, the point is there has to be a way for the government to help places that add community value but don't necessarily rake in the money.
Ron Swanson: There is not. [sighs] The free market is a jungle. It's beautiful and brutal and should be left alone. When a business fails, it dies, and a new, better one takes its place. Just let business be business and government be government.
Waiter: Here you go.
Ron Swanson: And one number eight. All right, party time.
Leslie Knope: I would suggest sticking around and watching him eat it 'cause it only takes four minutes, and it's pretty amazing.
Ron Swanson: [removes salad leafs] These will not be necessary.

Andy: Pawnee Videodome is where I rented my first Bruce Lee movie. And my second Bruce Lee movie. And when I was in seventh grade, I went out back in the alley behind the store, and there was a giant hornet's nest. And I threw a rock at it, and it exploded. And hornets came out.
Leslie Knope: Andy-
Andy: [loudly] The point is, obviously, you do not throw rocks at a hornet's nest.

Dennis Lerpiss: Hello. Welcome to Pawnee Videodome. Today we'll be screening Stanley Kubrick's 1957 classic Paths Of Glory. It's about three men who refuse to go on a suicide mission and are executed for cowardice.
Leslie Knope: Or we could, you know, maybe screen a different movie. One that's a little bit more upbeat. Like Finding Nemo or...
Dennis Lerpiss: I could do, uh, Shoah.
Leslie Knope: Okay, Paths Of Glory it is.
[aside to camera:]
Leslie Knope: This is the Pawnee Videodome. And we are here because I started a program to help local business. This is a Pawnee institution. This is the place where Perd Hapley shot his movie review show Lights, Camera, Perd.
[archive clip of Lights, Camera, Perd:]
Perd Hapley: It's a heartwarming story, but it's just not believable. Which is why I give E.T. 1 and 1/2 stars.

Leslie Knope: I think I have a plan of how to save your store. If we get the Pawnee Historical Society to declare your store as a historical landmark, then you might get enough of a tax break to keep your business afloat.
Ron Swanson: That sounds like the government meddling in private enterprise.
Leslie Knope: Well, Ron, we all know how much you love the free market. But the Pawnee Videodome is the only place in town where people gather to do something intellectual. That and the slam poetry nights at Beanie's Coffee. But I do not count those because those poems do not rhyme. [rapping style] Anything can be a slam poem if you say it like this. [scoffs] It's pointless.

Ron Swanson: This man is a failure. He is not up to snuff. His business is failing, and you're bailing it out. This is a bailout, and I don't like it. And there are some pretty intellectual conversations down at Barrett's Hardware.

Leslie Knope: You may get a little heat for this, okay? So use your money wisely. Get popular films that people wanna see.
Dennis Lerpiss: Like, uh, get the Tarkovsky movies with the subtitles.
Leslie Knope: No. Like Pixar. Reese Witherspoon. I know this is gonna hurt, but maybe some Michael Bay.
Dennis Lerpiss: What? No, no. No.

Leslie Knope: Pawnee needs a place where the community can gather to discuss and appreciate art. A place where you can rent such films as Cinema Paradiso or Rashomon.
Ron Swanson: You rented Rashomon? What was your favorite part of that?
Leslie Knope: I haven't rented it, actually, yet. But I like the idea that there is a place where I could rent Rashomon.
Morris: Uh, you can just watch it online, for free, whenever you want.
Leslie Knope: Bailiff! Thank you, Mr. Swanson, for your absurd opinion, which is shared by no one. Now, are there any more public comments before we vote? [a long line forms] Mm.

Ron Swanson: Councilwoman. I just came down to see the effects of your government intervention, and I've got to hand it to you. You really turned this place around.
Leslie Knope: Really? Oh, my God, this is amazing, Dennis.
Dennis Lerpiss: Hey.
Leslie Knope: You did it! We did it! I did it. This is me.
Ron Swanson: Yes, it was.
Dennis Lerpiss: I took your advice. Got rid of all those dusty, old foreign films and used the money for the part of our business that's always done pretty well for us. Give the people what they want, right?
Leslie Knope: This isn't what people want.
Andy: It's definitely what that guy wants.
Herman Lerpiss: I like this store now.
Leslie Knope: Do you realize what you have done? The Pawnee government now effectively owns a porn shop. You have made us porn peddlers!
[aside to camera: Ron laughs]

Leslie Knope: Although we are all sad and deeply grossed out that the Pawnee Videodome is turning into a porno palace, I am happy to announce that the Pawnee government will be hosting a weekly movie night here at the Community Center. There will be free screenings followed by a discussion led by local film buff Dennis Lerpiss. Tonight's film is... The Sound Of Music. [applause] And... action.
Brandi Maxxxx: [on video] I'm glad you're here, Dong Swanson. The local video store's about to go under. We have to save it.
Leslie Knope: Oh, this is the wrong movie. We ne-- Shut this down, please. Shut it down.
Dong Swanson: [on movie] Sorry, Leslie. I'm a strict libertarian, and I don't believe in bailouts.
Leslie Knope: This is not how it happened.

Dennis Lerpiss: The reason I love that film is that it's really depressing. Speaking of which, sadly, next month, Pawnee Videodome will be closing its doors. Forever.
Leslie Knope: No!
Dennis Lerpiss: For those of you that have attended our screenings, I want to thank you for your patronage, though I wish you would have rented more movies.
Leslie Knope: Guys, we have to help out Dennis and his business. Everybody rent something, so we can help Dennis. Sir, will you rent something?
Morris: Why would I do that? All movies are online for free. I'm watching Iron Man 2 on my phone right now.
Leslie Knope: Okay, you're not helping. I, for one, am going to rent Finding Nemo.
Dennis Lerpiss: Ooh, we don't carry cartoons. But if you want a film about the ocean, we have a documentary about the brutality of Japan's whaling industry. It's called Tears Of My Blowhole. And it's... It's nauseating.
Leslie Knope: [stammers] I'll just buy some Red Vines.
Dennis Lerpiss: Oh, we only have Japanese slime candy and, um, Bulgarian wheat balls.
Andy: Leslie, seriously, where are we?