Perd Hapley Quote #23

Quote from Perd Hapley in Bailout

Dennis Lerpiss: Hello. Welcome to Pawnee Videodome. Today we'll be screening Stanley Kubrick's 1957 classic Paths Of Glory. It's about three men who refuse to go on a suicide mission and are executed for cowardice.
Leslie Knope: Or we could, you know, maybe screen a different movie. One that's a little bit more upbeat. Like Finding Nemo or...
Dennis Lerpiss: I could do, uh, Shoah.
Leslie Knope: Okay, Paths Of Glory it is.
[aside to camera:]
Leslie Knope: This is the Pawnee Videodome. And we are here because I started a program to help local business. This is a Pawnee institution. This is the place where Perd Hapley shot his movie review show Lights, Camera, Perd.
[archive clip of Lights, Camera, Perd:]
Perd Hapley: It's a heartwarming story, but it's just not believable. Which is why I give E.T. 1 and 1/2 stars.

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 ‘Bailout’ Quotes

Quote from Ron Swanson

Leslie Knope: Go ahead, Ron. Let me have it. Oh, wait, I'll do it for you. [as Ron] I told you so, Leslie. This is what happens when the government interferes with business. Government is bad, business is good. Free market. [babbles goofily]
Ron Swanson: Capitalism is the only way, Leslie. It moves our country forward. It's what makes America great. And England okay and France terrible.

Quote from Jerry

Ben: Okay, so you're really gonna say no to Ann?
Chris: I care about Ann very deeply, but... I just don't know if I'm cut out to be a dad.
Jerry: You know, Chris, every parent makes mistakes. I mean, lord knows I've made plenty. But it's the small victories that keep you going. When you see your little one take her first step or... or graduate college, oh, my God, it just makes it all worth it. [chuckles] And another thing is if-- If, like-- If I-- [exhales] You know, and then your kid's-- because you're like--vrrrr-- I don't know. And everyone's like, "Oh." [babbles] Oh, I'm sorry, guys. I--no one ever lets me talk this long. I just got lost.
Chris: It was a beautiful point. And very well said, right up until that moment that you started babbling incoherently.

Quote from Chris

Chris: I made everything worse. If Tom were a bag of flour, that flour would never grow up to be a happy, well-adjusted loaf of bread. Much less a bran muffin, which is the highest honor that flour can achieve.