Rory: We were supposed to watch the three Godfather's and Sofia dying over and over and eat our biscotti and...
Lorelai: Okay, listen, calm down. We just need to revise our plan.
Rory: We were supposed to have a week.
Lorelai: Okay, tonight we stay home and pack. Tomorrow we get up early. We'll get all the stuff you need, and that will give us time to watch at least two Godfather's and a Sofia dying. We'll still have a partial day and a great biscotti night.
Rory: Chinese.
Lorelai: What?
Rory: Food. Order it. Go.
Lorelai: No, no time for full sentences!
Rory: Right.
Lorelai: Ordering!

Lorelai: I'm so wiped. I shouldn't have taken that third Excedrin PM last night.
Rory: Third? Why'd you take three?
Lorelai: Oh, well, originally I took two, then somewhere around four in the morning, I woke up and had a major Marilyn moment.
Rory: Oh, no.
Lorelai: I forgot that I'd taken something and so I popped a third one and now I'm about ready to sleep with a Kennedy.
Rory: Well, I hear Kerry's available.

Lorelai: God, Mr. Jet Lag wants to be my best friend.
Rory: Well, do you wanna go home and rest?
Lorelai: No. We have a Godfather night to salvage. Check the list.
Rory: Okay, we got the sheets, towels, bathroom shower caddy, and the basic first aid accoutrement. We still need to hit the beauty supply, the hardware store, stationery store.
Lorelai: The mattress store.
Rory: You do know that they supply you with a mattress at the dorm.
Lorelai: [scoffs] Yeah. A mattress that decades of students in various states of cleanliness have slept on. Some without pajamas.
Rory: Gross.
Lorelai: Exactly.

Lorelai: Hey, I'm looking for a good daytime cream and a good nighttime cream.
Kirk: For you?
Lorelai: No, for Rory.
Kirk: Is she sensitive, prone to breakouts if the cream is too heavy?
Lorelai: Yeah.
Kirk: I thought so. Okay, first of all, I would stay far away from that one. Much too rich for her. This one is light with a fresh citrus scent and it is completely natural.
Lorelai: We like that.
Kirk: Now, for day, I would recommend something with a sunscreen. Rory has a classic peaches and cream complexion, and it would be a crime if, when she got older, her face started to look like a cowboy.
Lorelai: I couldn't agree more.

Kirk: Miss Patty showed me the castanets you brought her.
Lorelai: Oh yeah?
Kirk: Yeah.
Lorelai: And Andrew showed me the T-shirt from the Picasso museum.
Kirk: I must admit, I was a little jealous. I mean, I hate Picasso, but I love T-shirts. And Pete seemed to really enjoy the Tower of London nutcracker you brought him.
Lorelai: Kirk.
Kirk: A nutcracker's a very useful thing to have around. I can't tell you how many times I've been sitting in my living room with a nut thinking, "if only I had a way to crack this."
Lorelai: Okay, Kirk, I'm really sorry, we got a little messed up on the presents. It just got so crazy over there. I mean, we forgot to bring something back for Luke.
Kirk: I heard he got jam.
Lorelai: Fake jam.
Kirk: I love fake jam.

Lorelai: Rory, we need to get this stuff before tomorrow. There's no way we can do that if we have to drive all the way to Hartford and back. She'll understand. Well, the first part was true.
Rory: I can't skip dinner.
Lorelai: Come on, we're gonna go to dinner next week and every week after that for the rest of our lives. And I do mean the rest of our lives because my parents will outlive us. The damned can do that.

Lorelai: And there's more after you proposed and she said yes? What, you-
Luke: We got married.
Lorelai: You got married? How could you get married?
Luke: We asked the captain and he married us.
Lorelai: And that's legal?
Luke: Apparently.
Lorelai: So you're married? You're legally married? This is just-
Luke: Actually, there's a little more.
Lorelai: And she's pregnant. Oh my God, you finally reproduced.
Luke: We're getting divorced.
Lorelai: I'm gonna sit down now.

Luke: It just all happened so fast.
Lorelai: Well, yeah.
Luke: I mean, you're on this boat in the middle of nowhere and everything's moving and you feel weird all the time. There's this endless supply of food and drink. Midnight buffets, by the way, are the reason the rest of the world hates us. And everyone around us was either in love, engaged, or celebrating their hundredth wedding anniversary, and we were having a good time and there you go.
Lorelai: There you go.
Luke: Of course, the next morning we both woke up and realized we'd lost our minds. We tried to ignore it for awhile, you know, went snorkeling, but by the time we hit land, we were separated, and now we're getting divorced.
Lorelai: Okay, well, my jet lag and your love life is making me dizzy. Is there more?
Luke: Nope, that's it.
Lorelai: I'm sorry.
Luke: Ah, it's okay.

Lorelai: [answers phone] Hello?
Rory: She's taken me hostage.
Lorelai: What?
Rory: She's not letting me leave. Dinner lasted an hour. She didn't even put the souffle in the oven until we'd already finished, and now we're watching taped ballroom dancing competitions that date back to the 1800's.
Lorelai: You haven't left yet?
Rory: Are you listening to me? I can't leave. She won't let me leave ever. This is Iran in '79 and you are Jimmy Carter. What do we do?
Lorelai: Well, first we have to lose the Jimmy Carter comparison, and second, I have to come get you.
Lorelai: This is about me and me not showing up, so maybe if I put in an appearance, she'll let you go.
Rory: Okay, but come quickly because she's got a lot of tapes and they rewind really slow.

Emily: Now I think you're really going to see quite a difference from the early eighties. They really start to mix it up in '88. Oh, see right there, see that move? Five years ago it was not allowed. Could've gotten you kicked right out.
Rory: That's harsh.
Emily: Oh, yes. Ballroom dancing can be very harsh. Oh, look. The couple in the purple feathers, that's Corky and Shirley Ballas. I love them, they are so talented. Corky's actually writing a musical based on their life as ballroom champions, and their son, Corky Jr., is going to play him as a young man.
Rory: Wow. Two Corky's in one show. Don't see that everyday.