Kirk: Miss Patty showed me the castanets you brought her.
Lorelai: Oh yeah?
Kirk: Yeah.
Lorelai: And Andrew showed me the T-shirt from the Picasso museum.
Kirk: I must admit, I was a little jealous. I mean, I hate Picasso, but I love T-shirts. And Pete seemed to really enjoy the Tower of London nutcracker you brought him.
Lorelai: Kirk.
Kirk: A nutcracker's a very useful thing to have around. I can't tell you how many times I've been sitting in my living room with a nut thinking, "if only I had a way to crack this."
Lorelai: Okay, Kirk, I'm really sorry, we got a little messed up on the presents. It just got so crazy over there. I mean, we forgot to bring something back for Luke.
Kirk: I heard he got jam.
Lorelai: Fake jam.
Kirk: I love fake jam.