‘The One with the Videotape’
Season 8, Episode 4 - Aired October 18, 2001
When Ross and Rachel tell their friends about how they came to hook up, a disagreement over who came on to whom prompts Ross to reveal he has their encounter on a video tape.
Quote from Joey
Monica: No, they're really cool. They were on their honeymoon too.
Chandler: They're terrific. And they live right here in the city.
Monica: Can we go call them? Is it too soon to call?
Chandler: Sorry. We're just kind of excited that we finally have a couple to hang out with.
Joey: A couple? Like two people? Like one, two people?
Quote from Monica
Monica: This is different. Greg and Jenny are in a relationship.
Phoebe: Ugh. Greg and Jenny? Ugh. "Hi, Greg. I'm Chandler. This is Monica." "Hi, Monica. This is Jenny." "Hi, Jenny. Hi, Greg."-[mutters]
Chandler: Listen, they are great. If you just got a chance to-
Joey: You know what? Why don't you just give us our souvenirs and get the hell out of here.
Chandler: We didn't get a chance to-
Phoebe: You've got to be kidding me!
Monica: We didn't get anything for anyone.
Joey: Mm-hm, yeah. Nice necklace.
Monica: That you can have.
Quote from Chandler
Rachel: Look, I have a sonogram picture.
Monica: Good.
Chandler: Ross, it's got your wavy, black lines.
Quote from Joey
Rachel: Well, it happened about six weeks ago. And I had just got home from work and Ross was already there. I guess you'd been hanging out with Joey.
Joey: You're welcome, buddy.
Ross: Yeah, thanks.
Quote from Rachel
Rachel: You know you kissed me first.
Ross: What? You were begging me to kiss you. You were sending me signals all other the place.
Rachel: I was sending you signals?
Ross: Yeah.
Rachel: Oh, please. Okay. Anyone in this room that thinks that I would actually send Ross begging signals, please, show of hands. [nobody but Ross raises their hand]
Ross: It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter what people believe. What matters is what happened.
Quote from Ross
Rachel: Okay. So these signals, Ross, explain these to me. Because maybe I need to be more careful. I mean, am I sending you these signals right now?
Ross: You know what, Rachel? Just drop it.
Rachel: No, please. Show me how I begged you.
Ross: I can show you. I have it on videotape. It's an expression.
Quote from Joey
Phoebe: I can't believe he taped the two of them having sex.
Joey: Yeah. You gotta tell a girl before you tape her. Such a rookie mistake.
Quote from Joey
Chandler: You know who has a great video camera?
Phoebe: Greg and Jenny?
Monica: Do you still want to call them? I want to call them.
Chandler: Let's call.
Joey: Yeah. Ask them if they brought their friends any souvenirs.
Quote from Joey
Ross: Do you have a minute? I'd like to talk to you about something I'm really uncomfortable talking about.
Joey: Sure. What? How about you showering with your mom?
Ross: I actually had a topic in mind.
Quote from Ross
Ross: Please help me. I have a date tonight and it has to go well. I'm scared for my health.