Dr. Green: Her legs are fine.
Ross: I know that.
Dr. Green: So why do you let her go to a chiropractor?
Rachel: I'm sorry, "let her"?
Ross: What can I do? She doesn't listen to me about renter's insurance, either.
Dr. Green: Wait a minute. You don't have renter's insurance?
Rachel: No.
Dr. Green: What if someone steals something? How you gonna run after him, with one leg shorter than the other?

Rachel: Excuse me, Dr. Bobby happens to be an excellent doctor.
Dr. Green: Wait a minute. His name is Dr. Bobby?
Rachel: That's his last name.
Ross: And his first name.
Dr. Green: He's Bobby Bobby?
Rachel: It's Robert Bobby. And excuse me, he helps me.
Ross: Please. Ask her how?
Dr. Green: What do you need help for?
Rachel: My alignment. I've got one leg shorter than the other.
Dr. Green: Oh, my God.
Ross: Argue with that.
Rachel: What? It's true. My right leg is two inches shorter.
Dr. Green: Come on, you're just tilting!

[Gunther angrily watches Rachel kiss Ross]
Ross: Hi, Gunther.
Gunther: Yeah. We'll see.

Rachel: Just one dinner. One night. For me. Please? I just want him to love you like I do. All right.
Well, not exactly like I do. But if you do come to dinner, I'll love you like I do in that black thing that you like.
Chandler: I'll go.
Ross: Fine.

Rachel: This is fixable if we act fast, okay? I'll invite him to brunch tomorrow, and you can make nice.
Ross: Honey, I have tried to make nice. It doesn't work.
Rachel: Okay. Look, Ross, I realize my father is difficult. But that's why you have got to be the bigger man here.
Ross: Sweetie, I could be the bigger man. I could be the biggest man. I could be a big, huge, giant man, and it still wouldn't make any difference. Except I could pick your father up and say, "Like me! Like me, tiny doctor!"

Ross: Question. When you guys were kids and you played Happy Days, who were you? I was always Richie.
Monica: I was always Joanie.
Joey: Question: Was, uh, "Egg the Gellers" the war cry of your neighborhood?

Joey: Hey, now. And I'm bleeding. Okay, great.
Phoebe: Wow. And I'm a vegetarian

Monica: Why is this car in my bedroom?
Phoebe: I'm sorry. I wasn't looking and the store won't take it back, because you signed for it.
Monica: When did I sign for it?
Phoebe: When I was you. You know what, it's all Joey's fault, because he left his nose open.
Monica: Did you make brownies today?

Chandler: You told him to play the boxer gay?
Joey: Well, I might have said "super-gay."
Chandler: You totally screwed him over.
Monica: Joey, you're this guy's teacher. How could you do this?
Joey: Because, Monica, the guy's so good. And I really, really want this part.
Phoebe: Well, if you really, really want it, then it's okay.

Ross: So I told Carl, nobody, no matter how famous their parents are is allowed to climb on the dinosaur. Of course, this went right in one ear.
Rachel: [inner monologue] I love how he cares so much about stuff. If I squint, I can pretend he's Alan Alda.