‘The One with the Kips’
Season 5, Episode 5 - Aired October 29, 1998
When Ross finally tells Rachel that Emily doesn't want him to see her any more, Rachel worries that she will be phased out of the group like Chandler's old roommate, Kip. Meanwhile, Chandler and Monica's romantic weekend away ends in an argument and leads Joey finding out about their relationship.
Quote from Joey
Chandler: The reason we didn't tell anyone is because we didn't want to make a big deal out of it.
Joey: But it is a big deal. I have to tell someone.
Chandler: No, no, no. You can't.
Monica: Please. We just don't want to deal with telling everyone. Please just promise you won't tell.
Joey: All right. Man, this is unbelievable. I mean, it's great. But ...
Monica: I know. It's great. [Monica kisses Chandler]
Joey: Aw, I don't want to see that!
Quote from Monica
Phoebe: "The most popular Phoebe in tennis is called the overhand Phoebe." "If you win, you must slap your opponent on the Phoebe and say, 'Hi, Phoebe'!"
Monica: That's cute. We really all enjoyed it. But you know it doesn't count.
Phoebe: Count for what?
Monica: Doesn't count in our heads as good Mad Libs.
Chandler: I guess fun time's over.
Monica: No, wait, wait, guys. If we follow the rules it's still fun and it means something.
Chandler: I'm going to take off.
Monica: Guys, rules are good. Rules help control the fun.
Quote from Rachel
[Rachel has her head back because of a nose bleed]
Rachel: I'm sorry. What did you want to tell me? [Rachel snorts] I'm sorry. Sorry.
Ross: Okay. I can't see you anymore.
Rachel: Yeah, I know, it's ridiculous. I can't see you, either.
Quote from Joey
Rachel: Oh, God, it's already started. I'm Kip.
Monica: Oh, honey.
Joey: Yeah, you're not Kip.
Rachel: Do you even know who Kip is?
Joey: Who cares? You're Rachel.
Quote from Phoebe
Rachel: Phoebe, I'm sorry about the whole "lifting out" thing. You got to come with me.
Phoebe: Come where?
Rachel: Wherever I go. Come on, you and me, we'll start a new group. We're the best ones.
Phoebe: Okay, but try to get Joey too.
Quote from Phoebe
Phoebe: We're so stupid. Do you know what's going on in there? They're trying to take Joey.
Quote from Ross
Phoebe: Wait a minute. So, when Emily comes, you're just, you're not going to see Rachel anymore?
Ross: Well, look, I'm just trying to focus on the "I get to see my wife" part, all right? And not on the part that makes me do this. [drinks Pepto-Bismol straight from the bottle]
Quote from Joey
Monica: So you'll never be in a room together? How will that even work?
Ross: I have no idea. I mean- But I assure you, I will figure it out.
Joey: It doesn't seem like it's going to work.
Quote from Chandler
Rachel: Hi, guys. What's going on?
Chandler: We're flipping Monica's mattress.
Joey: So I'm thinking, basically, we pick it up, and then we flip it.
Phoebe: Yep, that's better than my way.
Rachel: Oh, hey. Guys, would you flip mine too?
Chandler: Oh, man.
Quote from Chandler
Phoebe: Can you hear anything?
Chandler: Oh, yeah, somebody just said, "Can you hear anything?"