‘The One with Ross's Teeth’
Season 6, Episode 8 - Aired November 18, 1999
When Ross whitens his teeth ahead of a date, he ends up with an insanely bright smile. Meanwhile, Rachel is put in a difficult position when Phoebe reveals she kissed Ralph Lauren.
Quote from Chandler
Rachel: You guys are never gonna believe this but Phoebe made out with Ralph Lauren today.
Chandler: What?
Monica: Oh, my God.
Rachel: Yeah, she ran into him at my office, and they just made out. The craziest thing is, now my boss likes me because I told her about it and she said it's the best gossip she's heard all year.
Chandler: I am proud of all my friends today.
Quote from Chandler
Monica: I can't believe Phoebe made out with Ralph Lauren. Gosh, I'm so jealous!
Chandler: Hi, I'm Chandler, your live-in boyfriend.
Monica: Chandler, please. Come on. Look at him.
Chandler: Well, I am no woman, but that is one tasty dish.
Quote from Rachel
Phoebe: Ooh, who's the silver fox?
Rachel: That is your make-out buddy. Don't you recognize him? Oh, wait. "Ooh, Phoebe, I love you. Kiss me, please."
Phoebe: That's not Ralph Lauren. It sounds like him, though.
Rachel: What?
Phoebe: Yeah, no. Ralph doesn't look anything like that guy. He's young, and he's got long hair and a beard and a Hacky Sack-
Rachel: Oh, my God, Phoebe. That's not Ralph Lauren. That's Kenny the copy guy.
Quote from Phoebe
Phoebe: Why would the copy guy say he's Ralph Lauren?
Rachel: To get you to make out with him.
Phoebe: Aww.
Quote from Ross
Monica: Ross, maybe if your skin was lighter, your teeth wouldn't look so bright.
Ross: Oh, great. So all I need to do is get some new skin. Thank you.
Quote from Monica
Monica: I just think if we put just a little bit of makeup on you-
Ross: Whoa, whoa, whoa! We're not 13 anymore.
Monica: Ross, this is the only thing left that has a shot at working.
Ross: But won't she notice I have makeup on?
Monica: Please, half the guys out there have makeup on.
Ross: What?
Monica: I mean, half the people. Just try it and see.
Quote from Chandler
Monica: So now our drawers will smell nice, and we didn't waste these pantyhose.
Chandler: Because God forbid we throw out old underwear.
Quote from Monica
Monica: You go over to Joey's and drink some beer and hammer up some dry wall.
Chandler: You know, when guys hang out, they don't just drink beer and hammer up dry wall.
Monica: When girls hang out, we don't have pillow fights in our underwear. I'm sorry. We do. I don't know why I said that.
Quote from Chandler
Chandler: Hey, Ross, I was wondering if- [Ross is applying make-up] Oh, my God. Where are all the men?
Quote from Joey
Monica: Okay, but Joey come over later, because I'm gonna teach you how to make a bird feeder out of a pine cone and some peanut butter.
Joey: Aww, I love birds.