‘The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance’
Season 6, Episode 4 - Aired October 14, 1999
After Joey injures himself just as his health insurance lapses, he is forced to take an acting job while in agony. Meanwhile, Ross begins teaching a class at NYU and adopts an English accent to impress his students, and Rachel discovers Ross's secret.
Quote from Ross
Ross: So without retesting their results in the laboratory, the team would never have identified the initial errors in their carbon dating analysis. Were there any questions at this point? Yes?
Student: What's happening to your accent?
Ross: [in a British accent] Come again? What's this nonsense? [laughs] All right. I'm not English. I'm from Long Island. I was really nervous, and the accent just came out. I'm sorry. So if we could just get back to the lecture. Um, were there any questions? About paleontology? All right, look, I was just trying to make a good first impression. Obviously, I screwed up. But what you guys think of me is really important because I'm hoping to get a permanent job here. So if you'd just give me another chance to make a good impression-
Rachel: Ross. Are you crazy? I am still your wife? What, were you just never gonna tell me? What the hell is wrong with you? Ugh, I could just kill you!
Ross: [in a British accent] Well, 'ello, Rachel!
Quote from Ross
Ross: [in a British accent] Right. So when Rigby got his samples back from the laboratory, he made a startling discovery. What he believed to be igneous was, in fact, sedimentary. Imagine his consternation when- Oh, bloody 'ell.
Quote from Rachel
Monica: Okay, do it one more time.
Rachel: Really? Really?
Monica: Yes.
Rachel: Okay. [in an Irish accent] Hello, Ross? This is Dr. McNeely from the Fake Accent University. We'd like you to come on-board with us full-time!
Quote from Estelle
Joey: Hey, Estelle, listen-
Estelle: Well, well, well. Joey Tribbiani. So you came back, huh? They think they can do better, but they all come crawling back to Estelle.
Joey: What are you talking about? I never left you. You've always been my agent.
Estelle: Really?
Joey: Yeah.
Estelle: Oh, well, no harm no foul.
Quote from Rachel
Russell: Hello, is Ross there?
Rachel: No, he's not. Can I take a message?
Russell: Yes, this is Russell, Ross's divorce lawyer. Just tell him that since I haven't heard from him, I assume he's giving the marriage a try.
Rachel: Ross got married again? Aah! No!
Quote from Phoebe
Ross: "There are three primary theories concerning sediment flow rate. Each of these theories can be further sub-categorized into two..."
Phoebe: Oh, this is it. This is what's gonna kill me.
Quote from Monica
Kurt Rathman: Dr. Geller? Kurt Rathman. I'm a professor in the paleontology department here. Do you have a moment to talk about your lecture?
Ross: [in a British accent] I'm sorry, I've got plans with my sister.
Monica: [in an Irish accent] Monica Geller.
Ross: [British:] Right, will you excuse us for one moment? [normal:] What are you doing?
Monica: [normal:] Oh, you can have an accent, but I can't? [Irish:] Top of the morning to you, laddies!
Quote from Joey
Joey: Hi, Joey Tribbiani. I'm here to audition for "Man."
Casting Director: You mean "Dying Man."
Joey: Yes!
Quote from Ross
Ross: Oh, my God. I see what this is. You are in love with Rachel.
Phoebe: What?
Ross: Of course. It all adds up. I mean, you're obsessed with her. It's always: "Ross, what are going to do about Rachel? Ross, why are you moving in with Rachel? When are you going to confess your secret marriage to Rachel?" You want her.
Phoebe: No.
Ross: [cell phone rings] Oh, saved by the bell.
Quote from Ross
Ross: Remember that paper I had published last year on sediment flow rate? They loved it.
Rachel: Well, who wouldn't?
Ross: I know!