Monica: Okay, I don't want to be negative so I'll say that most of the signs you bought are good.
Phoebe: No, they ran out of "It's a Girl!" But I can fix this one. See? Huh?

Monica: Welcome home.
Rachel: Hi.
Monica: Phoebe did the signs.

Joey: Hey, so where's Ross?
Rachel: He's downstairs getting the stuff out of the cab.
Joey: Is he still mad at us?
Rachel: Well, you more than me. But he can't stay too mad at me. I mean, I just had his baby.
Joey: That's not fair. I can't do that.

Rachel: Yeah, and I'm not sure you should be here when he comes up.
Joey: See, this is what I was afraid of. I didn't think I should be here either, but somebody said he'd be over it.
Chandler: Hey, what do I know? I wanted to get a bigger gorilla.

Ross: Okay. I put most of the stuff away.
Rachel: Oh, great. The pacifiers?
Ross: It's in the cupboard.
Rachel: The burping cloths?
Ross: Linen closet.
Rachel: The diapers?
Ross: In the hospital.
Phoebe: Wow, you guys got a hospital? Fancy.

Rachel: I think I'm going to wake her up.
Phoebe: Oh, no. Rach, no. You know, you're never supposed to wake a sleeping baby.
Rachel: Well, I can do whatever I want. I made her.

Phoebe: Well, I would say I told you so, but she's kind of doing that for me.

Phoebe: Well, we already tried feeding her, changing her, burping her- Ooh, try this one. "Go back in time and listen to Phoebe."

Joey: Look, Ross, we have to get past this.
Ross: Give me the bag.
Joey: No, I don't know what else to do. I said I'm sorry-
Ross: Joey.
Joey: Now you should scream at me or curse me or hit me.
Ross: I'm not gonna hit you.
Joey: Why not? You'll feel better. I'll feel better. And you know you want to, I can see it in your eyes.
Ross: No, I don't.
Joey: A little bit.
Ross: No.
Joey: Little bit.
Ross: No.
Joey: A little bit more.
Ross: Joey, give me the bag. Give me the bag.
Joey: No, hit me. Hit me.
Ross: Give me the bag. Joe, I'm not kidding.
Joey: Hit me.
Ross: No.
Joey: Hit me. Hit me. Hit me.
Ross: [shrieking] You ducked.
Joey: I'm sorry. It was a reflex.
Ross: Oh, my God. This really hurts!
Joey: I couldn't help it. When a fist comes at your face, you duck. Look.
Ross: What is the matter with you?
Joey: You were supposed to duck. Why didn't you duck?
Ross: Why don't we talk about this on the way to the hospital?
Joey: Good. Good. Yeah, maybe while we're there, they can check your reflexes.

Monica: Try feeding her again.
Rachel: I already fed her.
Monica: I know. That's why I said, "Again!"