Everybody Loves Raymond Quote of the Day
Friday, June 18, 2021
Frank: Come on, Robert.
Robert: Where are we going?
Frank: To the lodge to tell the story. You go in before me and build me up. I don't like to toot my own horn.
Robert: No, no, I'm not comfortable with that.
Frank: Oh, yeah? How was living in my house for 40 years? Was that comfortable?
Robert: All right, all right.
Frank: I believe you were comfortable eating my food, watching my TV, wearing the springs out of my furniture with your two-ton rump.
Robert: All right!
Thursday, June 17, 2021
Marie: I was passing by my window and I couldn't help seeing into your window. And I noticed, you bought a new vacuum.
Debra: It's amazing what this thing picks up, Marie. And no bags!
Ray: No bags!
Marie: I am so glad this worked out.
Debra: What do you mean?
Marie: Well, when the saleslady called me and told me she had the greatest cleaning innovation since the broom, I immediately thought of you.
Debra: You sent her over here?
Marie: Of course!
Ray: I did not know that.
Marie: Well, you two enjoy. I would never want to interfere with housework.
Wednesday, June 16, 2021
Marie: What about Angela, Robbie? She seemed so genuine and so refined. We have so much in common.
Robert: Forget it, Ma. It's not gonna happen.
Marie: Oh, no! What did you do?
Ray: What happened, Robert? Did she eat another one?
Marie: What? Eat another what?
Robert: You don't wanna know, Ma.
Marie: You tell me right this minute, young man.
Robert: All right, Ma, fine. She eats bugs.
Frank: Come again?
Tuesday, June 15, 2021
Debra: I can't sleep! I'm seething! She actually has me seething!
Ray: You know what? You shouldn't let her ruin your evening. And probably the best way to get even with her is to just just do what you had planned, you know? I mean, for instance, if you were gonna watch TV, then just watch TV. Or if you were gonna do something, I don't know, interactive.
Debra: What? Are you trying' to have sex now?
Ray: No, no, no. I'm just brainstorming.
Debra: Yeah. Forget it. Your mother's ruined the whole night, just like she's ruined every other night! [tries to read a book] Oh, what the hell! [kisses Ray]
Monday, June 14, 2021
Debra: You are such a pessimist.
Ray: I am not a pessimist.
Debra: Oh, no? You are incapable of seeing the good in anything. What is that called?
Ray: A realist. And I can see the good in a lot of things, okay? How about last year when we went skiing and I didn't break anything?
Debra: That's because you sat in the lodge the whole time, saying: "I don't wanna break anything."
Ray: I enjoyed it in my own way. I liked the hot chocolate. Although, I hear now that fake sweetener stuff will kill you. It's crazy.
Sunday, June 13, 2021
Marie: Frank, the young man at the Health Fair said--
Frank: That stupid Health Fair. I go in there looking for a chocolate cone at the drugstore, next thing I know I'm getting my blood pressure taken.
Marie: My blood pressure was better than yours.
Frank: But I won the eyesight thing.
Ray: So did you have the cholesterol checked to break the tie?
Frank: Yeah and I won.
Marie: We're waiting for the urine test. I could still tie if your father has high blood sugar.
Saturday, June 12, 2021
Saturday, June 19, 2021
Sunday, June 20, 2021
Monday, June 21, 2021
Tuesday, June 22, 2021
Wednesday, June 23, 2021