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‘The Annoying KId’ Quotes Page 1 of 2

Everybody Loves Raymond: The Annoying KId

708. The Annoying KId

Aired November 11, 2002

Debra thinks they've finally found a couple, Lauren (Cheryl Hines) and Neil (Craig Anton), they can spend time with, but Ray isn't keen on their son, Spencer.

Quote from Debra

Ray: Look, I'm telling you, I just don't like that kid. I don't make you spend time with people you don't like.
Debra: Oh no?
Ray: What? Oh, my parents?
Debra: Yes, your parents. They take up all the time we would normally spend with friends. In fact, they're friend-repellent.

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Quote from Ray

Debra: Aw, that's too bad. The kids really liked him. What are we gonna tell them?
Ray: We'll just explain to them that a wicked witch baked him in a pie.

Quote from Frank

Frank: Who can't we stand? Your mother?
Robert: No, we're talking about that Spencer. Kid's weird. [touches food to his chin and eats]
Ray: I know. Isn't he annoying? He's annoying.
Frank: Sure. He's a kid. All kids are annoying. You two were horrible.
Ray: No, we weren't.
Frank: Oh yes, very much so. You'd go around talking funny, playing your stupid crap. It bugged the hell out of me.
Ray: Look, this kid's in a class by himself, okay? I was nothing like him.
Frank: Well, he's definitely smarter than you were. Even now it's pretty close.

Quote from Ray

Lauren: These are so good. Your mother-in-law brings these over?
Debra: Yes, she does. From right across the street.
Lauren: Oh, boy. They're not that good.
Debra: So you've met her?
Neil: Is that the lady who was watching me park before?
Ray: Yeah, right next to the guy who was hitting the lawn mower with a shovel.

Quote from Debra

Lauren: Watch. His mother will fake a sprained ankle and we'll have 'em all winter.
Debra: I still win. It's always winter.

Quote from Debra

Debra: What are you talking about? Spencer's cute.
Ray: Cute! Cute? So I guess the word means nothing now. He never stopped with his voice.
Debra: Oh, are we criticizing someone else's voice, Ray?
Ray: Oh. Ho-hody-ho-ho.

Quote from Ray

Ray: That kid is no damn good.
Debra: All this because you didn't get a third cannoli.
Ray: No. No, how about the space gun on my chair? That could have been an embarrassing trip to the emergency room.
Debra: Ray, come on, he wouldn't do that on purpose. He was just playing.
Ray: He was not playing, okay? I'm a good judge of character. That kid, he knew exactly what he was doing.
Debra: He's eight.
Ray: That's 40 in weasel years.

Quote from Ray

Debra: Raymond we are going to be friends with these people, and you are going to make it work because you are a grown man, and I believe that you can do this. I believe that you can get along with an eight-year-old child. I really do. [walks off]
Ray: He hurt my heinie.

Quote from Marie

Marie: Raymond's skin is nice now, but when he was younger, he had blemishes.
Ray: Okay, Ma.
Marie: Remember when you came home from school crying because they called you "Pimply Pete"?
Robert: [laughs] Pimply Pete!
Ray: Shut up!
Marie: What? You grew out of it, just like Robbie and his nighttime accidents.
Robert: Ma! Come on!

Quote from Ray

Debra: This has been so much fun. I'm sorry we didn't do this sooner.
Lauren: I can never get Neil to go anywhere.
Neil: I don't usually like people.
Ray: I hear you.
Neil: Especially new people.
Ray: There you go.
Debra: Ray would be happy living in the bathroom.
Neil: That's right. Lauren, he's like me.
Lauren: Then I feel sorry for her.

Quote from Ray

Spencer: Beep! Enemy targets identified. Beep!
Ray: Ha ha ha. We're under attack. Hey, guys, you know where there's a lot of other enemies? Out in the backyard.
Spencer: Negative.
Ray: [stands up] Seriously, guys, why don't you go outside, you know? See if you can do something. [Spencer puts his toy weapon on the chair as Ray goes to sit back down] Agh! What the heck?
Spencer: Target destroyed!
Neil: You okay there, Ray?
Ray: Yeah. I think I'm all right. My target's not completely destroyed.
Debra: It wasn't in that great a shape to begin with. I'm kidding.
Ray: Ha ha ha, yeah yeah.

Quote from Ray

Ray: Oh, wait. Hold on, Spencer. I think the cannolis are for the grownups. The cookies are for you guys.
Spencer: I hate cookies.
Ray: No, they're all sprinkly and sugary, you know, and, you see, that's mine.
Spencer: I'm the guest. [eats the cannoli] Ew! This is gross! [throws it away] Robots, mobilize!

Quote from Debra

Neil: Well, this has been great, but we really should get going. Robot Commander, we're blasting off!
Lauren: When our remodel is done, you guys are coming over.
Debra: The kids are gonna wanna get together before then, so why don't you come over next weekend?
Lauren: Oh, we don't want to impose. I mean, you've got Ray's parents...
Debra: No, but this is different. You're invited.

Quote from Ray

Debra: Oh, wow. They are great, huh? You know what? They were here for four hours. That just flew by.
Ray: Yeah.
Debra: What?
Ray: No. Nothing. It's just felt like four hours.
Debra: What do you mean?
Ray: Not crazy about the boy.

Quote from Ray

Ray: I'm telling you, that kid, he's a pain.
Debra: He is not! The boys loved him.
Ray: He steals.
Debra: What?!
Ray: My cannoli. He stole my cannoli.
Debra: You know, I feel bad for you. I really do. Why can't you focus on the wonderful afternoon we just had instead of finding the microscopic negative?
Ray: Oh, I need a microscope to find [robotic voice] Robot Commander! [makes beeping noises] I specifically said, "Spencer, the cannolis are for the grownups. I think the cookies are for you." And you know what that little weasel says? "I'm the guest!"
Debra: "Weasel"? Look, he was our guest. If he wanted a cannoli, what's wrong with that?
Ray: What's wrong with that? He took one bite of it and he threw the whole thing out. Look at him in there.
Debra: Ray.
Ray: Look at him!

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