James: What was that?
Orla: The wind. Or a banshee.
James: What's a banshee?
Michelle: A crying bitch.
Clare: We will perish here. We will perish in this place.
James: Oh, great. I'm gonna die a virgin.
Michelle: That was always on the cards, to be fair.

James: Listen, Erin... something changed when I was standing at the end of that tunnel. Something shifted.
Erin: What tunnel?
James: You know, yesterday. The tunnel, the light, the voice, the brush with death.
Erin: Oh, aye, sorry. Go on.
James: What terrified me most was all the things I hadn't done.
Erin: Like a hot-air balloon.
James: What?
Erin: Well, I remember you always banging on about how much you wanted to go on a hot-air balloon, but I always thought that that was really...
James: Yeah, I looked into it, but it was so expensive.
Erin: Really? How much?
James: Could I just finish my point?
Erin: Fine.

James: What terrified me most was all the things I hadn't done, and all the things I hadn't said because I'd been too scared, or... or too nervous. A-A-And...
Erin: Are you all right?
James: I like me, Erin.
Erin: Sorry?
James: You. Shit. You. I-I... I like you, Erin. I think I've liked you for a long time, and I don't expect you to say anything, I just....I just want you to know that I... I think you're beautiful. Anyway, I just thought I'd... Sorry. [Erin kisses James]
Michelle: What the actual fuck?!

Michelle: Oh, you sick, sick bastards.
Erin: Listen, Michelle...
Michelle: This is incest!
James: No, it's not.
Michelle: Yes, it is, James.
James: We're not related.
Michelle: Oh, and that makes it OK, I suppose?
James: Well, it makes it not incest.
Michelle: Right, OK. I'm gonna give you the benefit of the doubt, and say that that head injury was much worse than what we thought, and you are temporarily possessed by whatever evil spirit is rattling about this joint, which has caused you to lose the absolute fucking run of yourself.
James: This is none of your business, Michelle.
Michelle: Oh, but it is, fuck features. It is very much my business. This can't happen. OK? You two can't get together, because, putting aside the fact that it makes me want to boke my actual ring up, if you get together, you'll break up, and then where does that leave me, Erin? You might be my best friend but he's my cousin, and dickhead or not, I'll have to stick with him. Don't put me in that position.

Sister Michael: What in the name of the risen Jesus is happening here, exactly?
Erin: Sister Michael, thank God. I don't know how to explain this, but...
Sister Michael: I suggest you try.
Erin: It's Robert.
Sister Michael: Who?
Erin: Your aunt Annie's husband, Robert.
Orla: He's come back from the dead, Sister.
Sister Michael: Right. My aunt's name is Maura. She never married. And this isn't her house. I only stopped here because I saw the van on the side of the road.
Clare: This... isn't her house?
Declan: Are you all high?!
Sister Michael: There's a mile to go before you hit Maura's house. The house I sent you to tidy up. The house that is still an absolute state. The house I need to have a wake in this afternoon.
James: Oh, dear.
Sister Michael: Oh, dear, indeed.
Michelle: So whose house is this, then?
Declan: Mine! Me and the wife are in the middle of moving in and... Would you just get off me, please?!

Declan: I just came down here to do some odd-jobs, assemble some furniture and stuff. But when I arrive, one of the windows has been smashed, and this lot were in the process of thieving all our stuff.
Erin: We didn't steal any of your stuff, Robert.
Declan: My name is Declan!
Erin: Aye, but you're the double of Robert.
Declan: That's because he's my grandfather.
Erin: That actually does make a lot of sense.
Clare: What about the writing?! The warning on the mirror we couldn't have imagined that.
Michelle: Yeah, so, remember I said I was bored? I was really fucking bored, girls. Look, I really regret it, OK? I absolutely ruined a good lipstick.

James: Look, we're really close now. Let's just grab our stuff and walk. [gets out of the van]
Erin: Are we still moving?
Clare: Definitely feels like we are.
James: Pull the handbrake, Michelle!
Michelle: What's he saying?
James: The handbrake! Pull the bloody handbrake!
Erin: Something...something about a brake.
Michelle: Is it one of them wee pedal-y things?
James: Not the pedal-y thing! The stick thing!
Michelle: Stick thing, stick thing.
James: Jesus Christ!
Michelle: Oh. Press it, did he say?
James: Pull it! Pull it!
Michelle: Fuck's sake. Relax your cacks, James.
James: Jesus. Ah, ah. [van stops]
Erin: Well done, Michelle.
[As James turns around, the van continues rolling and knocks him out]

Aunt Sarah: We're here to see Carlos Santini.
Gerry: You know, Sarah, I have a feeling this might be him.
Carlos Santini: Enter.

James: Oh, my God, look at this. Sister Michael's aunt and her husband. "Annie and Robert, 1941." Oh, my God.
Erin: What?
James: His death notice. He died really young.
Clare: That's so sad.
James: Robert didn't fight it. He walked towards the light.
Michelle: Will you shut the fuck up about your near-death experience, James?
Erin: Maybe Robert's still here.
Michelle: What, like in one of these boxes?
Erin: No. I mean maybe his spirit is still here. Maybe he loved Annie so much he wanted to stay and watch over her. Maybe he's watching over us. Maybe they both are. I know this sounds a bit mad, but I do sort of feel something here. Like a presence. It's like we're not alone. [glass smashes] Argh!
Michelle: Fuck me!
Clare: What was that?!

Carlos Santini: I have a gift. A gift that allows me to connect with people who are no longer with us.
Gerry: Yeah, we gathered that much, Carlos. I mean, we're not here for the Kimberleys.
Carlos Santini: Is there something wrong with the Kimberleys?
Aunt Sarah: Oh, Jesus, I hope not, I've polished four off already.
Joe: There's nothing wrong with the Kimberleys, Carlos. Gerry here is just a bit of an arsehole.
Carlos Santini: I see.