Esther Clavin: I couldn't help noticing, dear, that all the wedding dresses you favored were pure white. Can I assume that's appropriate?
Margaret: Well, here we are!
Esther Clavin: All right. Message received. None of my business.

Margaret: Cliff, is something wrong?
Cliff: It's about the wedding, Margaret. I don't think I want to get married just yet.
Margaret: Why, Cliff? Don't you love me?
Cliff: Oh, Maggie, of course I love you. But, if we're going to get married, I want it to be our decision, and not Ma's. That woman has been making decisions for me long enough. We'll know in our hearts when the time is right.
Margaret: Oh, Cliff!
Cliff: Maggie, when I propose to you, it's going to be the most romantic thing you've ever heard.
Margaret: I don't know, Cliff. It would be awfully hard to beat the way your ma said it.
Cliff: Yeah. Oh, Margaret? You'll, uh you'll still be my girlfriend, won't you?
Margaret: Oh, yes, Cliff. I understand completely. You want to be your own man.
Cliff: Exactly. All right! Now, would you get out there and tell that to my mother?

Cliff: Ma's really done it to me this time.
Frasier: Cliff, why do you have to do what she says?
Cliff: She's Ma.
Frasier: Look. Think back. Have you ever stood up to your mother?
Cliff: Have you ever stood up to Lilith?
Frasier: Touche, Cliff, but we're not discussing me.

Sam: All right, all right, all right. If you really think this is important, I'll, uh, I'll stop drinking coffee.
Rebecca: All right, good. I mean, we only have two days left in this month.
Sam: What do you mean?
Rebecca: Well, you see here on the calendar, l, I put a B for baby on the days when I'm likely to conceive. You know, the days when we should make love.
Sam: That's funny. I usually put an F.
Rebecca: F?
Sam: For "fertile." What did you think I meant? You know, I'm... I'm not so sure I want you to carry my baby.

Cliff: Listen, I've got some, uh, lunch reservations up there at Melville's for, uh, me and my gals. What do you say?
Esther Clavin: Oh, I get to have lunch, and then it's off to the ice floe.
Margaret: Oh, you must be referring to the custom of the Inuit people, where they set their golden-agers on an ice floe to die.
Esther Clavin: How did you know that?
Margaret: Oh, I love trivia.
Esther Clavin: Good answer.

Lilith: Woody, could we have some more pretzels, please?
Frasier: Woody?
Woody: Oh, sorry, Dr. Crane. I- I was just thinking about how big the universe is.
Frasier: Yes, it is, Woody. As a matter of fact, it's expanding all the time. Spiraling outward, ad infinitum, from the center of its origin at an alarming seven miles per second.
Woody: You mean all of us are getting bigger?
Frasier: Well, no, Woody, we we're not expanding. The universe is.
Lilith: Although some of us could stand to eat a few less jelly doughnuts.
Woody: So, as the universe expands, what happens to us?
Frasier: Well, someday we'll just explode into billions of atoms, which themselves will cease to exist in time. Why, in ten quadrillion years, there'll be nothing left of anything.
Lilith: May I have those pretzels now, Woody?
Woody: Sure, better get them while you can.

Norm: So, uh, what's the occasion, Cliff?
Cliff: My girlfriend, Margaret. Just picked her up at the airport, dropped her off at the hotel. She'll be by in a few minutes.
Norm: All right! Margaret's back from Canada.
Cliff: Yeah, yeah. She just couldn't take those brutal freezing winters those sub-zero temperatures, the lonely sense of isolation, so she's, uh, coming back to me.
Carla: Yeah? Well, the grass is always greener.

Sam: Hey, Cliffie, do we, uh, hear [glasses jingling] wedding bells?
Cliff: Ah. [chuckling] Not for this muchacho, there, Sammy.
Sam: What are you talking about? I thought you always wanted to get married.
Cliff: No, no, no, no. No time soon, that's for sure. Hey, there's still a lot of postage left on this U.S. male.

Rebecca: Sam, that's not the point. You were supposed to stay in peak physical condition. You know, caffeine loading could be the reason why we haven't been able to conceive for the last two months.
Sam: Come on. It's just a cup of coffee.
Rebecca: No, Sam, you have to promise me something. Till I am pregnant, you have to stay in better shape. You have to stop drinking coffee, stop eating junk food and stop staying up late watching movies.
Norm: Why don't you just kill the man?

Rebecca: I think I figured out why you haven't been able to give me a baby.
Sam: What makes you think it's my fault?
Rebecca: Well, I've been doing some reading, and I think I know what the problem is. You wear bikini briefs, don't you?
Sam: Sweetheart, I know the lights are usually out, but I do take 'em off.